Day by day

The tree of the human soul: reflections on Catherine's Dialogue

2012-01-18T12:19:00.009-05:00

Villanova Campus, Fall 2011

I have been studying Catherine's Dialogue recently and discovered some deep lessons embedded in the text. Catherine of Siena was a 14th century Dominican mystic and reformer, and is one of the first women declared a Doctor of the Church (1970). One paragraph in particular (from the section on perfection), in which the Father instructs Catherine on the virtues, struck me:

Do you know how these three virtues [humility, discernment, & charity] exist?

Imagine a circle traced on the ground, and in its center a tree sprouting with a shoot grafted into its side. The tree finds its nourishment in the soil within the expanse of the circle, but uprooted from the soil it would die fruitless. So think of the soul as a tree made for love and living only by love. Indeed, without this divine love, which is true and perfect charity, death would be her fruit instead of life. The circle in which this tree's root, the soul's love, must grow is true knowledge of herself, knowledge that is joined to me, who like the circle have neither beginning nor end. You can go round and round within this circle, finding neither end nor beginning, yet never leaving the circle.

This knowledge of yourself, and of me within yourself, is grounded in the soil of true humility, which is as great as the expanse of the circle. But if your knowledge of yourself were isolated from me there would be no full circle at all. Instead there would be a beginning in self-knowledge, but apart from me it would end in confusion.

So the tree of charity is nurtured in humility and branches out in true discernment. The marrow of the tree (that is, loving charity within the soul) is patience, a sure sign that I am in her and that she is united with me. This tree, so delightfully planted, bears many-fragranced blossoms of virtue...and every fruit produced by this tree is seasoned with discernment."

How many of us take the time to get to know ourselves, and I mean, really know ourselves? Not out of some narcissistic vanity, but in an earnest and heartfelt exploration of the unique life and identity that God breathed into us? By the time we reach young adulthood, many of us carry scars from broken relationships, trauma, or selfish preoccupation. We have also grown in some virtues, but like untrained gardeners we let ourselves grow wild - weeds, trees, and flowers end up tangled together with no shape or form. It can be hard to sort through our wounds, our pasts, our fears, our dreams and our passions. Yet if we never learn to prune and care for ourselves with humility, discernment and charity, we will end up a tangled mess by the time we die, filled with fear and confusion rather than peace and clarity.

Humility and patience in particular rarely seem to touch our consciousness in an age where instant gratification is the name of the game, and once-sacred things like human life, relationships, and worship have become commodities, ready to be purchased, consumed, traded or disposed of in the marketplace. Yet the marrow of our souls must be patience, and our roots must draw nourishment from the soil of humility. Humility is not some false modesty - it is a clear, unflinching truthfulness about oneself, with a glimmer of the notion that we are tiny, frail creatures in a vast, mysterious universe of possibility. Humility is only possible with self-knowledge. Self-knowledge must be joined to God in intimate friendship in order to bear real fruit - that is, our sanctification. They all work together, these virtues.

Each of us has a unique combination of personality and virtues or gifts - "there are different kinds of spiritual gifts but the same Spirit" (1 Co 12:4). We are invited to explore and learn more about ourselves and our gifts via discernment, and to put them to service for God and neighbor in loving charity. When we really know ourselves, enlightened by Divine grace, there is so much good we can do. The harvest is plenty, but the laborers are few. We need so many more discerning laborers - for the poor, the hungry, the marginalized, the war-torn, and the dying.

Somewhere else in the Dialogue, the Father informs Catherine that every virtue (and vice) is put into action by means of our neighbors. We are faced with choices in how we employ our gifts or vices: we can put our gifts into life-giving service of God and neighbor, or allow our vices to make us instruments of death for ourselves and others. Choose life.

Chaire, Kecharitomene! (Hail, full of grace!)

2011-10-30T08:15:00.006-04:00

I woke up this morning with Luke Ch. 1 swirling around in my head. The stories of Gabriel's visits to Zechariah and Mary are probably one of my favorites.

There are some stark contrasts between Gabriel's encounters with Zechariah and with Mary.

Gabriel meets Zechariah at the altar of incense, where he took his turn to enter the sanctuary. The angel is seen standing there, at the right of the altar. Gabriel meets Mary (no mention is made of where she was at the time) and greets her with "Hail, full of grace!" Although both are troubled by Gabriel's appearance, the angel reassures them in very specific ways, speaking to them of their future sons.

To Zechariah he says,

"Do not be afraid, Zechariah, because your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you shall name him John. And you will have joy and gladness, and many will rejoice at his birth, for he will be great in the sight of [the] Lord. He will drink neither wine nor strong drink. He will be filled with the holy Spirit even from his mother’s womb, and he will turn many of the children of Israel to the Lord their God. He will go before him in the spirit and power of Elijah to turn the hearts of fathers toward children and the disobedient to the understanding of the righteous, to prepare a people fit for the Lord."

To Mary:

“Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. Behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall name him Jesus. He will be great and will be called Son of the Most High, and the Lord God will give him the throne of David his father, and he will rule over the house of Jacob forever, and of his kingdom there will be no end.”

Zechariah's and Mary's responses are also very different.

Zechariah responds, "How shall I know this? For I am an old man, and my wife is advanced in years."

Mary responds, "How can this be, since I have no relations with a man?"

One responds with disbelief, the other with innocence.

Gabriel offers explanations to both, with opposite effects in Zechariah and in Mary.

The exchange with Zechariah leaves him mute:

And the angel said to him in reply, “I am Gabriel, who stand before God. I was sent to speak to you and to announce to you this good news. But now you will be speechless and unable to talk until the day these things take place, because you did not believe my words, which will be fulfilled at their proper time.”

Meanwhile the people were waiting for Zechariah and were amazed that he stayed so long in the sanctuary. But when he came out, he was unable to speak to them, and they realized that he had seen a vision in the sanctuary. He was gesturing to them but remained mute.

The exchange with Mary is punctuated by her fiat:

And the angel said to her in reply, “The holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. Therefore the child to be born will be called holy, the Son of God. And behold, Elizabeth, your relative, has also conceived a son in her old age, and this is the sixth month for her who was called barren; for nothing will be impossible for God.” Mary said, “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word.” Then the angel departed from her.

What fascinates me is how God doesn't leave Zechariah and Elizabeth to struggle on their own with their overwhelming reality. Gabriel slips in the news to Mary that Elizabeth is already pregnant. After the angel leaves her, what does she do?

"Mary set out and traveled to the hill country in haste to a town of Judah, where she entered the house of Zechariah and greeted Elizabeth."

There are clearly many, many lessons embedded here. I walked away from this meditation with a few thoughts. One can't help but experience a sense of wonder at the intense closeness of God's loving presence in the lives of his little ones. God involves both humans and spirits like Gabriel in the salvific plan, as collaborators and co-heirs to the Kingdom. There's also a caution to us - be careful when we express disbelief in the authenticity of God's gifts. Our tendency to be doubtful often grows with age. Take the gifts with joy and trust, not doubt or fear. Finally there's a shining example of what one should do in response to God's call - a trusting surrender to Divine Will: "May it be done unto me according to your word."

The Stoning of Joseph Ratzinger in a classroom

2011-09-08T16:20:00.017-04:00

"So an atheist, a Baptist, and a Lutheran were sitting in a Catholic university class on Jesus Christ and Christian ethics..."

Sounds like the beginnings of an odd joke, doesn't it? It isn't. It's one of my graduate theology classes. One of the first works we studied this semester was Jesus of Nazareth: Holy Week: From the Entrance into Jerusalem to the Resurrection. What I found both disturbing and informative was the mob mentality against Ratzinger that developed early in the class, led in large part by one of our Protestant colleagues but joined by the other two as well as other fellow Catholics. They complained about everything from his use of the word "proper," "clearly", or "only" as an "abuse of power" to the "lack of academic rigor" of the work for discussion in our class ("Jesus Christ and Christian Ethics"). They somehow missed the point of why our professor had assigned the reading, which by the way, was not an academic discourse addressed to a motley crew of theology students, but a pastoral dialogue with people who desired a more personal encounter with the person of Jesus.

The work was intertwined with lessons about Christian living, which in turn had significant implications for Christian ethics. For example, in his reflection on Peter's notion of heroism and the true meaning of discipleship, he states:

"He must bid farewell to the heroism of personal deeds and learn the humility of the disciple. His desire to rush in [on the Mount of Olives] - his heroism - leads to his denial...he must learn to await his hour. He must learn how to wait, how to persevere. He must learn the way of the disciple in order to be led, when his hour comes, to the place where he does not want to go (cf. Jn 21:18) and to receive the grace of martyrdom. The two exchanges are essentially about the same thing: not telling God what to do, but learning to accept him as he reveals himself to us; not seeking to exalt ourselves to God's level, but in humble service letting ourselves be slowly refashioned into God's true image." (71-72)

I initially tried to respond to some of the complaints about Ratzinger's mode of discourse that he not only informed his audience (in the forward to Volume I) that this "is in no way an exercise of the magisterium, but is solely an expression of my personal search for the face of the Lord", he went further to state that "everyone, is free then, to contradict me. I would only ask readers for their initial goodwill without which there can be no understanding" (xxiii - xxiv). However I was silenced 10 minutes into class and was asked to yield to the other students. Having had time to reflect on my own, here were my concerns about what happened that day.

Accusing Ratzinger of "abusing his power" as Pope

While I appreciate the right to voice an opinion in any environment, refusal to study or at least inquire about the nature and role of the papacy while making sweeping accusations about a person in that role is never justified. To be fair to Ratzinger, he neither lobbied to be Pope, nor did he desire this post - he obediently submitted to the traditions and customs of our faith and took up the post in resignation to God's will. To accuse someone in sweeping fashion of an "abuse of power", particularly from a vantage point outside our faith, without presenting sufficient evidence that he/she comprehends or at the very least takes into consideration the nuances of our values and our systems of governance, only perpetuates the sort of bigotry I see against others based on their religion.

Ratzinger's vocation and concerns as a Roman Catholic Priest

No one gave due time to consider that Ratzinger wrote this as a Roman Catholic priest with the desire to "facilitate for others a personal encounter with Jesus" (xvii). His priesthood is his vocation. A Roman Catholic priest has chosen a life of sacrifice, service and guardianship of others, especially members of his own parish or congregation. A bishop's responsibilities in that regard grow on an order of magnitude, and the Pope's, even more so. Yet in the end, they are, first and foremost, priests - brother priests of Jesus attempting in their own flawed yet loving way to do as He instructed. If Ratzinger came down hard on other theologians in this book, my sense was that it was with a mind to protect and guard those left to his care by the Good Shepherd. He's not going to pop his collar off when he writes something, even if to a broader audience ~ and it is unreasonable to expect him to put aside his priesthood when he picks up his pen. It is a part of who he is, which we should acknowledge as we would of any other theologian who is a minister or leader in his/her own faith. He should have at least been given that latitude to express himself as such.

Reading a translation of a work from a different language

I further found criticisms of Ratzinger's use of the English language irritating for two reasons: first, the text we're reading was not written in English by him (it was a translation); and second, like Ratzinger, my first language is not English. English is not even his second language (it's French). I feel that to be fair about nitpicking use of the English words like "proper" and "clearly" or "only" in his text we should at least first extend the courtesy of reading said work in his native language, with an understanding that German use of language and forms of discourse differ from American forms in ways that can be miscommunicated or misinterpreted in translation. If we do not know his native language, then we should recall that this work was a translation by the Vatican Secretariat of State and keep that firmly in mind before launching into a petty attack on his words. In addition, Ratzinger, in his effort to dialogue with others of different cultures and faiths, at least extended the courtesy of learning not just English but eight other languages. I defy anyone in the classroom to claim they have extended the same courtesy to others when addressing the topic of Jesus and the Christian life.

***
I hope some day it will be less fashionable to verbally bash someone like Joseph Ratzinger in a Catholic setting (with a dash of atheists and Protestants) before actually granting him the initial goodwill he asked for regarding his ruminations about Jesus Christ. He is a theologian and fellow pilgrim on the path Home, with as much freedom to enter the dialogue as the next. Granted - our Church is in the midst of a scathing scandal. Administrative and pastoral issues are being addressed constantly. Pope Benedict the XVI himself publicly and rather harshly addressed the bishops in Ireland and in the US about the sex scandals. Our Church, wounded and broken, must constantly address the problems of evil, especially when they emerge from inside our Church, and most urgently when it comes from our most trusted adults: priests. That having been said, our study of theology must also move forward in contemplating God and fellow brethren, in asking for more light to be shed on how we can love as Jesus did and forge an even deeper bond of friendship with Him and with our fellow human beings.

Before I formed you in the womb..

2011-05-29T22:03:00.005-04:00

Unfinished rosaries awaiting corpora

Last Wednesday I learned how to make simple plastic beaded rosaries at a young adult gathering. I made one to donate to the military and another to donate elsewhere. On Friday I started learning how to make a knotted rosary with the help of a tutorial from Rosary Army. After having successfully made one from macramé cord, I wondered if I could apply the same types of knots on smaller cord, using beads and one of my own crucifixes. To my surprise it worked wonderfully. I bought some cord and beads, ordered some more rosary crucifixes, and started creating to my heart's content.

Somewhere in the sixth or seventh hour I recognized how each rosary I was making with someone specific in mind had special, unique characteristics - a difference in knot size, a slightly irregular bead in one decade, different color/bead combinations, spacing, and even different prayers for the individuals as I made them. By the end of the day I had several rosaries made except for their corpora. I would have to wait for the crucifixes to arrive sometime over the next week. It seemed a pity that I couldn't finish them all at once...they just needed their Jesus and they'd be done!

It was then that a line from Jeremiah entered my thoughts:

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I dedicated you, a prophet to the nations I appointed you." - Jeremiah 1:5

Earlier in the week I had been wrestling in prayer with my vocational call, asking the Lord for more concrete direction, at times frustrated at the darkness and the sense of being "incomplete". The prayer experience in that hour of rosary creation was consoling - the Lord has His own plans for me, in His own time. He knows me, knows my purpose, and hears my prayer. I will keep vigil and trust in Him to reveal more when the time is right.

Finished rosary

"Come to me...I will give you rest"

2011-05-16T15:39:00.007-04:00

Fish pond in LAX area hotel | 5.13.2011

The last several days were hectic and full of noise. As an interim caregiver for different family members over the past couple of years I had grown used to a certain routine, working in my responsibilities with everything else in my busy life. One thing I hadn't done before was travel with my current charge, who was in a wheelchair. New challenges, some rude encounters at the airport, and unexpected obstacles littered our path as we flew across the country to meet and catch up with family. I found myself stripped of my usual appointments with the Lord at daily Mass or adoration, unable to take my customary quiet time in company with Him. By the second day I wanted to crawl out of my skin - my soul cried out for a quiet space of stillness with the Lord.

It was then, very early in the morning, that I decided to wander through the hotel where we stayed. My duties were done for the moment and I had a little time to chill. Few people were awake, and the lounges were relatively empty and quiet. I came upon an indoor pond stocked with fish and turtles. In my hurry the previous day I hadn't noticed how beautiful and quiet it was, even though it was literally along the path of breakfast and reception traffic, the busiest and noisiest part of the hotel in the mornings and evenings. I watched one rather large and pretty fish just floating in the water under a large leaf. The water around it was moving but it remained still. As I watched the ripples drifting from its head like so many straying thoughts, I suddenly found a space with the Lord. "Rest," he said, "stay with me here". It was a blessed moment - the Lord in His great kindness found a space to be with me even though I was deprived of all our usual meeting places. So I stayed - and prayed - and found rest. May you find the quiet spaces where the Lord invites you to rest with Him. I leave you with that quote from Matthew that found me in my tiredness on that strange day:

"Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for your selves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light." ~ Matthew 11:28-30

Morning surprise

2011-02-19T07:14:00.008-05:00

Pennsylvania Sunrise
February 14, 2011

Early in the morning on Valentine's Day, my dog wanted to go out. When I opened the front door the most beautiful sunrise almost knocked me over - there were clouds streaking across the tree line, and an amazing wash of pink and blue glowing all across the sky. The horizon was alive and bursting with color. I stepped back in surprise and awe. It was as if God said at my door, "ta DA!! Good morning! I'm HERE and I LOVE you!!" All I could say in response was, "Wow..."

The Lord shared that sunrise with me in a very special way - he bowled me over with a Hobbes-like pounce, full of joy and happiness and humor. Our spirits met, and creature and Creator shared a jubilant embrace. It was no small thing either that he chose to pop in with such a grand gesture on Valentine's Day ~ the One I love most gave me the most beautiful thing I could cherish and enjoy that day: his own work. He reminded me of how much he loves us all and wants us to come Home to him. May you come to know that love in your life, too.

"Sorry Fido, it was fun, but I'm graduating. You're on your own."

2011-02-01T08:43:00.021-05:00

One morning I was chatting with a family member about how we remember seeing an increase of abandoned animals on the streets at our alma mater in Chapel Hill, NC. We saw this collectively as far back in the 1970s (before my time) and the 1990s (when I was in college). Apparently the problem is still widespread - college students all over the country abandon their pets each year, dropping them off at shelters, or worse, leaving them on the street or throwing them in dumpsters. A 2009 Fox News article pretty much said it all:

"MUNCIE, Ind. — While away at college, many students find comfort and companionship in owning a pet — but for some, the commitment to their animals only lasts as long as the school year. During this time of the year, college town shelters, like the Muncie Animal Shelter, often see an increase in the number of pets being abandoned. The animals are abandoned either at the shelter or on the street, said Julie Smith, office manager at the shelter in Muncie, home of Ball State University". Read more here.

The gross disregard for the dignity of these animals by so many college students seems consistent with the wider disregard among older adults for the dignity of any life, animal, human, and otherwise. The notion of "life" takes the form of a commodity to be bought, modified, or ended in an almost transactional fashion. Earlier today, an AP News article reported "100 dogs were shot dead over two days after an expected post-Olympics boon in dogsledding business at an adventure company didn't pan out. Most died instantly, but others suffered — like the one that ran away with its "face blown off and an eye hanging out."" Really? The animals were mere business costs to be terminated when the profit margin is too slim? The employee who had to shoot the dogs had to be treated for PTSD following the incident. Clearly something is very askew here.

Looking at my own shelter dog of 14+ years, I remember being tempted to return him after a few days, completely stressed out by the amount of work involved. I was a young 20-something college grad and unprepared for the task. After a few months, I got into a routine and my house mate, who also had a dog, showed me the ropes in caring for a canine pal. Since then my little mutt has traveled with me through multiple cities and states; even in dog-unfriendly Boston I always somehow found at least one place that accepted dogs, whenever I moved. I know that I'll care for him until death separates us - through my friendship with him I've learned so much about loyalty, commitment and tolerance for occasional chaos. By bringing this dog into my life, the good Lord transformed my understanding of life as a gift to be cherished, rather than as a commodity.

Hey! What's your story?

2011-01-29T12:26:00.006-05:00

"I hate those pro-life people on campus - they're so judgmental if you don't agree with everything they say." Those were the words of a fellow co-worker in my office one day as a member of the aforementioned group made preparations for a pro-life event. I asked her to tell me more about it and she responded that they make others feel like they're bad people if they don't agree with their message and modus operandi. As I listened, she started asking questions about the March for Life like, "Why does it have to be on the level of a civil rights movement, and what the h-ll does it have to do with MLK?"

After taking a moment to reflect, I explained that if we look at it historically, Martin Luther King, Jr. spoke for an oppressed population and wanted others to know about it. His method was one of nonviolent protest. As a pro-life advocate, I told her, we also speak for an oppressed population, namely, children in the womb, and choose nonviolent protest as our method, which is annually expressed in the March for Life. The parallel is found in the subject matter (speaking publicly for the rights of an oppressed population) and the mode of expression (peaceful protest, i.e., the March for Life). She thought about it, and said, "Ok - I can see it when you explain it that way." As we continued on, she also told me about how horrible she thought the story about the abortion doctor was (who is being charged with murder) and how wrong those actions were. We ended our conversation amicably and wished each other well when it was time to go for the day.

I was saddened to hear that her experience with (primarily Catholic) pro-lifers on campus was one of condemnation and division rather than respectful, thoughtful and Christ-centered discourse. Too often we hear today of the divisions and rancor between people belonging to different political parties, races (yes, still!), religions and social classes. Very often the rancor occurs within communities holding the same fundamental beliefs in God, Christ and Church. This sort of behavior runs contrary to the witness we are called to bring to the world as Christians, something that must change if we want to push the dialogue further. While there is a natural tension between our call to be faithful witnesses to our beliefs and the pressures of the world to conform to its standards, we are called to be lights in this world. Our witness should serve as lamps to illuminate those divine truths passed down to us in Scripture and Tradition, not instruments of prosecution. We are not called to be judges, but rather siblings in God, brothers and sisters in Christ.

Thursday's Mass readings this week were particularly resonant for me, so I share them here with you.

Reading 1
Heb 10:19-25

Brothers and sisters:
Since through the Blood of Jesus
we have confidence of entrance into the sanctuary
by the new and living way he opened for us through the veil,
that is, his flesh,
and since we have “a great priest over the house of God,”
let us approach with a sincere heart and in absolute trust,
with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience
and our bodies washed in pure water.
Let us hold unwaveringly to our confession that gives us hope,
for he who made the promise is trustworthy.
We must consider how to rouse one another to love and good works.
We should not stay away from our assembly,
as is the custom of some, but encourage one another,
and this all the more as you see the day drawing near.

Gospel
Mk 4:21-25

Jesus said to his disciples,
“Is a lamp brought in to be placed under a bushel basket
or under a bed, and not to be placed on a lampstand?
For there is nothing hidden except to be made visible;
nothing is secret except to come to light.
Anyone who has ears to hear ought to hear.”
He also told them, “Take care what you hear.
The measure with which you measure will be measured out to you,
and still more will be given to you.
To the one who has, more will be given;
from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away.”

March for Life 2011: media coverage on the event

2011-01-25T11:52:00.006-05:00

Although the usual fast-food media outlets (NBC, ABC, CBS, FOX, CNN, etc) appeared to offer zero coverage of the March for Life before, during and after, I found other news agencies and individuals that did. Here are some stories (click on the headlines to read them):

Catholic News Agency

Pro-life vigil Mass draws thousands of nation's youth

The Daily American

Cold weather has no effect on March for Life

The Dallas News

Hundreds march in downtown Dallas to protest Roe vs. Wade decision

The Examiner

"March for Life" solemn reminder of "Philadelphia Horror"
Harrisburg Catholics head to DC to march for life

NPR
On "Roe vs. Wade" Anniversary, "March for Life" Underway in DC

Others

Rep. Mike Pence addresses March for Life supporters

Media malpractice and the March for Life

Right to Life march in Little Rock

A Youthful March for Life

Spread the word, keep the message alive about the sanctity of human life, from conception to natural death.

Peace.

Comfort, give comfort to my people

2011-01-07T07:37:00.025-05:00

Sr. Theresa Margaret
Convent of the Holy Name
Fourth Station

Br. Mickey McGrath, OSFS
Fourth Station

One morning I was talking with my spiritual director about how frustrating the darkness about my personal vocation can be. Though I do my best to listen to the Lord's call and to do His will each day, at the end of the day I can never tell with confidence whether I heard or responded correctly. I have no way of knowing that I'm doing what I was born to do, fulfilling the destiny God has for me. This has been my daily experience for years. At that point he made an observation: "We have a need for consolation, for some assurance that we're on the right path. This is normal." We continued to talk about other things, but that statement lingered with me. At the same time I felt a tug in my heart to meditate more on the Stations of the Cross, though the timing seemed a bit strange, given that we just celebrated Epiphany and were still in the midst of contemplating the Christmas mystery.

Later that night I went to a holy hour of adoration. I had my Pietà booklet with me, so I looked up the Stations of the Cross. Two Stations met me: the Fourth (Jesus meets His Mother) and the Eighth (Jesus Consoles the Women of Jerusalem). As I contemplated how Jesus consoled people even on the way to Calvary, it occurred to me that He did not just give consolation - as a human being, He also sought it. His agony before He was arrested attests to this. The moment between Him and His Mother was particularly moving - it was, in the same instant, a moment of consolation between God and creature as well as one of consolation between human mother and child.

It opened my eyes just a little to the consolations of God. In His own way, the Lord consoles me each day, whether it be the streaks of dawn filling the horizon, a quiet, full, stillness in adoration, or the vast expanse of stars across the night sky. In these moments He tells me, "Do not be afraid. I am here." It also reminded me that I must continue to trust that He will work with my nature and imperfections and transform my works into the good that He wants, if I surrender myself to Him. In my small human acts of love and consolation for the Heart of Jesus, He will return with a Love glorious and brilliant.

I leave you with two quotes from Scripture that I found especially consoling as I contemplated the journey Home:

Comfort, give comfort to my people, says your God. Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, and proclaim to her that her service is at an end, her guilt is expiated. He gives strength to the fainting; for the weak he makes vigor abound. Though young men faint and grow weary, and youths stagger and fall, they that hope in the LORD will renew their strength, they will soar as with eagles' wings. They will run and not grow weary, walk and not grow faint.
Isaiah 40:1-2; 29-31

Thus says the Lord GOD: O my people, I will open your graves and have you rise from them, and bring you back to the land of Israel. Then you shall know that I am the LORD, when I open your graves and have you rise from them, O my people! I will put my spirit in you that you may live, and I will settle you upon your land; thus you shall know that I am the LORD. I have promised, and I will do it, says the LORD.
Ezekiel 37:12-14

The Holy Innocents

2010-12-28T11:19:00.002-05:00

Malvern Retreat House, Family Life Center

Chapel Sanctuary, Dec. 2010

Today's Gospel reading (Matt 2:16-18) struck me:

"When Herod realized that he had been deceived by the magi, he became furious. He ordered the massacre of all the boys in Bethlehem and its vicinity two years old and under, in accordance with the time he had ascertained from the magi. Then was fulfilled what had been said through Jeremiah the prophet:

   A voice was heard in Ramah,
   sobbing and loud lamentation;
   Rachel weeping for her children,
   and she would not be consoled,
   since they were no more."

I think of the children in our world today and am faced with sobering facts. UNICEF estimates that more than 2 million children have died as a direct result of armed conflict over the last decade, and at least 6 million permanently disabled or injured. In the nine year period between 1995 - 2003, 42 million children were killed by abortion, according to the Guttmacher Institute. It reminds me of the urgency of the work and prayer needed to help others understand the sanctity of human life at such an early stage. The gospel of Matthew again echoes in my mind as I look for direction in my meditation:

"Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples rebuked them, but Jesus said, "Let the children come to me, and do not prevent them; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." ~ Matt 19:13-14

We look for the resurrection of the dead, and life everlasting

2010-10-26T08:14:00.004-04:00

I've been studying Pauline literature recently and found 1 Corinthians particularly meditative for me over the past month or so. Paul not only tries to describe for us the difference between resurrected bodies and our current natural ones, but he informs us that the change will happen at a designated time. Chapter 15 of the letter answered at least two questions:

Is the resurrection of the dead for real?
What's it going to be like?

I really enjoyed 1 Co 15:35-54. Paul had just finished explaining the significance of Christ's resurrection from the dead with regard to our own resurrection (15:12-34). The first half of the passage (15:35-49) explains the difference between our current mortal, corruptible bodies and the resurrected body. Paul tells us that what we sow is not the body to be, but a kernel of another kind. He also tells us there is an order to the resurrection - first earthly, then heavenly; first death, then life again. I've highlighted the terms and phrases that stood out most for me (I'm using the NAB translation).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
35 But someone may say, "How are the dead raised? With what kind of body will they come back?"

36 You fool! What you sow is not brought to life unless it dies.

37 And what you sow is
not the body that is to be
but a bare kernel of wheat, perhaps, or of some other kind;

38 but God gives it a body as he chooses,
and to each of the seeds its own body.

39 Not all flesh is the same,
   but there is one kind for human beings,
   another kind of flesh for animals,
   another kind of flesh for birds,
   and another for fish.

40 There are both heavenly bodies and earthly bodies,
but the brightness of the heavenly is one kind
and that of the earthly another.

41   The brightness of the sun is one kind,
   the brightness of the moon another,
   and the brightness of the stars another.
   For star differs from star in brightness.

42 So also is the resurrection of the dead.
It is sown corruptible; it is raised incorruptible.

43 It is sown dishonorable; it is raised glorious.
It is sown weak; it is raised powerful.

44 It is sown a natural body; it is raised a spiritual body.
If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual one.

45 So, too, it is written,
"The first man, Adam, became a living being,"
the last Adam a life-giving spirit.

46 But the spiritual was not first;
rather the natural and then the spiritual.

47 The first man was from the earth, earthly;
the second man, from heaven.

48 As was the earthly one, so also are the earthly,
and as is the heavenly one, so also are the heavenly.

49 Just as we have borne the image of the earthly one,
we shall also bear the image of the heavenly one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He doesn't stop there, though. Paul then throws us for a loop to remind us that the resurrection is also a mystery. Not all of us will die, he says, but all of us will be changed. We don't know much about the change except that which is corruptible must clothe itself with incorruptibility and that which is mortal must clothe itself with immortality. The term ενδυω (put on, clothe oneself) appears throughout the Pauline literature in reference to one concept: the things of God. We put on Christ, our new selves, the armor of light, the breastplate of faith and love, and so on. In the same vein, Paul tells us what is corruptible and mortal (in other words, our broken and sinful nature) must clothe itself with incorruptibility and immortality (those attributes that belong to God). We also know that the change will happen at a specified time: at the last trumpet. He provides us with the ultimate answer to our fears about death's power over our existence: death will be defeated. Quite an event to hope for, yes? May you glimpse God in your everyday life, and especially in Scripture.

1 Co 15:50-54
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
50 This I declare, brothers:
flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God,
nor does corruption inherit incorruption.
51 Behold, I tell you a mystery.

We shall not all fall asleep,
but we will all be changed,

52   in an instant, in the blink of an eye,
     at the last trumpet.
   For the trumpet will sound,
   the dead will be raised incorruptible,
   and we shall be changed.

53 For that which is corruptible must clothe itself with incorruptibility,
and that which is mortal must clothe itself with immortality.

54   And when this which is corruptible clothes itself with incorruptibility
   and this which is mortal clothes itself with immortality,
   then the word that is written shall come about:
   "Death is swallowed up in victory."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The double effect: regarding war

2010-09-30T08:23:00.004-04:00

Wrentham, MA 2009

I'm taking a graduate seminar on "The Challenge of Peace" (e.g., essays pro- and anti-just war) and have recently come across a notion called "the double effect". In her essay, "The Justice of the Present War Examined" (1981), Anscombe tells us that the double effect only excuses a grave incidental consequence (e.g., the killing of noncombatants or innocent civilians) where the balance of the total effects of an action is on the side of good. She makes the distinction between attacking a group of persons directly and killing them accidentally in the course of attack on others; she continues, "it is a different thing, while making one group of persons a target, to kill others by accident, and to make a group persons a target, in order - by attacking them all - to attack some members of the group who are persons who may be legitimately attacked". The first case, she says, involves no sin; the second involves murder and is not an example of a double effect.

Here's the rub: the catechism states, "Unintentional killing is not morally imputable, but one is not exonerated from grave offense if, without proportionate reasons, he has acted in a way that brings about someone's death, even without the intention to do so; all citizens and all governments are obliged to work for the avoidance of war..however..governments cannot be denied the right of lawful self-defense..the mere fact that war has regrettably broken out does not mean that everything becomes licit between the warring parties" (CCC # 2269, 2308, 2312).

I am left wondering if concepts like the double effect have too often and too hastily been used by states as a means to justify the use of excessive military force, often destroying the lives of the very people they claim to be protecting. I'm still parsing the concepts and theories - obviously a very complex problem.

One shot at immortality

2010-07-22T21:45:00.010-04:00

Immaculate Conception Chapel

St. Charles Borromeo Seminary

I've been adjusting recently to caring for my aging dog, who is now 14 years old and dying of kidney failure. The vet told me that given the late onset of the disease, he'll likely experience a "rapid deterioration" in the coming months. But, she told me, it would be relatively painless. I was relieved at that. What I didn't expect was a change in his sleeping, eating and social habits. My initial tendency to react with irritation to his behavioral changes was challenged by a growing realization that he needs even more TLC and patience. This phase in his life is an opportunity for me to exercise greater charity and kindness towards a creature that has been my friend since he was a puppy.

The lessons here have also translated to my relationships with other human beings. Aging parents, co-workers and friends going through life-changes, someone mourning the loss of a loved one - remind me not to over-react to the strangeness I sometimes encounter in their behaviors. Instead, gentleness and charity are the appropriate responses.

As I thought about the enduring relationships in my life, it occurred to me that this journey, the mortal part of my existence, is filled with opportunities to love as Jesus did, with a complete outpouring of self in service to the other. This is agape.

My death will be followed by a journey into eternity; eventually my body will be resurrected and by God's grace I will become immortal. However I only have one shot at eternal life; the lessons learned here will carry over into the next life. Providentially, my dog has been teaching me profoundly humbling lessons about gentleness, kindness, loyalty and veracity. I am so grateful to have received such lessons from such a dear friend on the path Home.

Alphonsus Liguori | The Value of Time

2010-06-26T14:22:00.007-04:00

Dusk | Eastern PA

06.24.2010

"The Lord gives us the remaining days of life, that we may compensate the time that has been badly spent..we should live with all diligence the divine will; and, should it be necessary, it is better to suffer in temporal things than to neglect our eternal interests..do not say, what you can do today, you can also do tomorrow; because this day shall then be lost to you, and shall never return. You have this day; but perhaps tomorrow will not be given to you." From Sermons of St. Alphonsus Liguori, sermon #24

Every once in a while I revisit sermons by various saints. St. Alphonsus Liguori is probably one of my favorites. This excerpt from sermon twenty-four speaks volumes to me. He reminds me to be mindful of time passing, and to make each moment of my life meaningful. It is true - no one knows his or her own expiration date - only that each of us has one. As my own time runs shorter, these admonitions become more pungent in my mind, spurring me to be more attentive to the Lord's voice.

"Where your treasure is, there will be your heart also."
~ Matthew 6:21

Jesus says this to the crowds in the middle of Chapter 6. The entire chapter is a lesson in prayer. It begins with a warning - righteousness is not a practice for show; it is a work of love. Rather than do good things for human adulation, we should work with focus on the kingdom of God. The Our Father, which Jesus teaches us soon after admonishing us, is a prayer of adoration and petition. We praise His name, ask for the coming of His kingdom, for our daily bread, for forgiveness and for perseverance. Jesus concludes by telling us not to worry about our needs, or when we're going to die, but to trust in the heavenly Father, who knows all our needs. Rather, he tells us, "seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides" (Matt 6:33).

How we use our time will echo into eternity, with greater effect when we acknowledge it as a gift from God and humbly put it into service for the Kingdom.

Garden time

2010-06-12T13:27:00.004-04:00

Deck Garden | PA

06.12.2010

It's been a while since I last wrote. As sometimes happens, life passed quickly and the days were full. One thing I enjoy is watching things grow. Plants are perhaps among my favorites, mostly because they challenge my lack of patience; I must respect their time - each plant germinates and flowers in its own cycle. I started some of these as early as late March, so it's been a long time waiting. Here's a smattering of my garden "play". Enjoy!

Italian herbs 05.27.2010

Italian herbs 6.12.2010

Basil 5.27.2010

Basil 6.6.2010

Wildflowers 3.2.2010

Wildflowers 6.12.2010

Holy Thursday

2010-04-02T13:37:00.009-04:00

"Before the feast of Passover, Jesus knew that his hour had come to pass from from this world to the Father. He loved his own in the world and he loved them to the end. So, during supper, fully aware that the Father had put everything into his power and that he had come from God and was returning to God, he rose from supper and took off his outer garments. He took a towel and tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began the wash the disciples' feet and dry them with the towel around his waist."

Every year when I go to Holy Thursday Mass, I am vividly reminded of two things:

By washing the feet of his disciples Jesus exemplified a model of love and humility, performing a task that traditionally could not be required of the lowliest Jewish slave (NAB, 1428)
Eucharist is both indescribably precious and completely dependent on the priesthood

I love the painting of Jesus washing Peter's feet (by Ford Madox Brown). When I see it and recall the passage from the Gospel of John, it becomes apparent to me that this act, which precedes him feeding them with his own flesh and blood, is an act of deep love and pastoral care. He models both slave and high priest. He is also the model that Catholic priests strive to follow. This scene exhibits both a quiet acceptance of the Father's will and an unspeakable generosity of heart towards his disciples, including Judas, who sold him for 30 pieces of silver (Mt 27:3).

Holy Thursday Mass also vividly reminds me of how precious our priests are because they are the only ones who can provide us with Eucharist, in obedience to Jesus' command at the Last Supper. It's a gift and a tradition that he left for us until he returns again. When the hosts are transferred and I see an empty tabernacle at the end of Mass, signaling the onset of Good Friday, I get a lurch in my heart - a twinge that reminds me of how heartbroken the disciples must have been when Jesus died. He was gone. And for three days his absence loudly rang in their hearts. It creates a lurch in me, too - to realize that we will not see Eucharist again until the vigil on Saturday night. As a daily communicant the hardest days of the year for me are between Holy Thursday night and Holy Saturday night. The tabernacles are empty, the crosses are covered, and a chill in my soul settles with the recollection that our Lord and Savior, who spent many days with his disciples, many meals with them, was killed in the most brutal way and suddenly seemed to be gone forever.

BBC and other fast-food media: judges, juries

2010-03-28T07:34:00.011-04:00

Perhaps one of the most frustrating things about reading the news from even so-called "reputable" news outlets is the tendency of these fast-food information houses to usurp the role of judge and jury in spite of their obvious inability to verify that they have all the facts around their cases (maybe that's why media won't ever be given legal authority to pass judgment on others). I was looking at BBC News with my morning coffee and must confess this was one of those mornings when I was embarrassed for this news outlet in light of its blatant editorializing of the situation around the Church scandals erupting around the world.

What fascinates me about the media's abuse of information is that they seem to be able to get away with it and sway otherwise-comatose consumers to come to the same conclusions. All the titles in the title bar for headlines (click the image above for more detail) are not, in fact, the actual titles for the news stories. I saw the headline Pope 'failed to act' on sex abuse and clicked it. Here's the actual title of the article:

They've obviously already led the audience to come to a conclusion before reading the article (the "analysis" of which is also heavily biased against the Pope and the Vatican, informing me as a critical reader that the amateur who wrote the article probably didn't do his/her homework or has already made a judgement on his/her own collection of "facts").

Having said all this about the dismal technique of certain journalists, I cannot ignore the issue in focus here: the scandals. Such abuse (in any venue, including schools, social services, homes, and parishes) is heinous and must be brought to justice. There's just no excuse for a system that does not allow for swift and appropriate response to such matters. My heart goes out to all involved - and I know that I will do my part to voice the need for reform on this matter.

The lesson here: ALWAYS be a critical thinker when new information comes to you, especially from news outlets or polemic writers. If you're on mental cruise control, chances are you'll never really know the truth of what's being fed to you and you may even fall prey to their Houdini-esque illusions of reality. Personally I prefer to cruise multiple sources and stick with the ones that provide access to documents or other primary data. BBC and other fast-food news tend to digest and regurgitate the info they think will sell - hence the reason I'll just skim it with my morning coffee, if at all (about 5 minutes).

Language & thought

2010-03-11T08:07:00.010-05:00

I read a very thought-provoking editorial with my morning coffee and wanted to share a quote from it:

"Most of the media is now using deadly loaded language. In doing so it is also promoting universal deceit, that there is some "right" to kill children in the womb. We have accepted this universal deceit and deadly loaded language at our own peril. It is an example of Orwellian "New Speak" which obscures the insidious nature of an evil which is rotting our culture from the inside out." ~ Deacon Keith Fournier, 03.10.2010

In this article by Deacon Keith Fournier, the issue at hand was the use of language to obfuscate the nature or truth of an act - in this case abortion "rights". The confusion in society about the ethics of killing children in the womb is obvious. For example, the murder of pregnant women sometimes results in trial for double homicide, other times in a trial for just the homicide of the woman. Recall the Laci Peterson case several years ago that spawned the debate about fetal homicide, and the law that was subsequently enacted. As of September 2009, 38 states have this law, which make it a crime for anyone (except the mother) to kill a child in utero.

In at least 21 of those states that law applies to the earliest stages of pregnancy, which include verbiage like "any stage of gestation, conception, fertilization and post-fertilization". Details on the laws in these states can be found at the National Conference of State Legislatures. In the midst of these laws that make it a crime for anyone other than the mother to kill a child in the womb, somehow it's still legal for the mother to kill her child in the womb. There are arguments that when the mother does it, it's something she can do with her "body" - when someone else does it, that part of her "body" suddenly becomes a person, whose right to live was wrongfully violated.

In a survey conducted earlier this year, a majority of Americans, and nearly 6 of 10 young adults, viewed abortion as morally wrong. The question that still needs to be thrashed out in society (hopefully quickly for the sake of the children in utero) is: should this act, considered morally wrong by a majority of adults & considered fetal homicide in most states when committed by anyone other than the mother, remain legal? With the answer "No" that would hopefully come about soon - the next step would be to provide the support, education and resources to enable women in crisis or unplanned pregnancies to carry through to term and give their children a chance to live, whether in their own homes or in the homes of loving foster families.

March for Life 2010 | It's hundreds of thousands, folks, not tens of thousands

2010-01-24T11:13:00.006-05:00

Constitution Ave and 1st | March for Life 2010

Washington, DC

I marched this Friday with a few hundred thousand others to protest the legalization of killing children in the womb. It was an amazing witness of unity and peaceful protest to speak up for the rights of children in the womb; we believe they also have the right to live. Women, men, children, grandparents, those with regrets about abortion, those previously pressured to have abortions, former abortion clinic workers and religious/clergy all joined together with one message: protect the right to life.

Very often I'm told that the media tends to skew the facts to minimize (or exaggerate) the reality of events. When it comes to the March for Life, major news outlets have consistently underreported attendance or simply not covered the event at all. It's anyone's guess why this happens. It certainly does understate to the rest of the country (and world) how many people take this issue seriously enough to get to Washington DC every year, from all over the US.

Although we actually had at least 200,000 in attendance this year (estimates approached 300,000), the following news outlets reported "tens of thousands":

The Washington Post - "Tens of thousands of abortion opponents took to the cold, gray streets of Washington yesterday"
CBS News - "tens of thousands of people were marching from the mall to the Supreme Court"

Here are some news outlets that came closer to reality:

USA Today - "Still, anyone can see hundreds of thousands of marchers pulling into town"
The Washington Times - "Hundreds of thousands of pro-lifers protested the 37th anniversary of legalized abortion Friday"

There are still "March for Life" events going on around the country as well:

Walk for Life West Coast - Jan. 23, 2010
Virtual March for Life - 80,000 and growing as of Jan. 24, 2010

Stay informed in your part of town - check things out from time to time; you may not be getting the facts you thought you were. Click on any of the hyperlinks above to read the articles or visit the sites mentioned.

Peace.

A Poem | The Flame

2010-01-04T20:26:00.002-05:00

A flame knows not when its light will die;

It just burns

Reaches, yearns:

Oxygen, air, sky.

My soul is aflame

It just burns

Reaches, yearns:

Love, truth..He came.

I know not when my light will go out

I just burn

Reach, yearn:

God, Heaven: He is my route.

by C.H. Pak

What is the theologian's vocation?

2009-12-23T17:41:00.001-05:00

Cotton field at Valley Forge, PA

November 2009

Since deciding to study theology and move away from more worldly disciplines, I've been grappling with the overall "usefulness" of the theologian in society. I want to draw closer to God, to know Him who Loves me. Much of society actively seeks to exclude God from everyday life. Why then does the theologian exist today?

Contrary to popular belief, it's not the theologian who makes discoveries about God. Rather, "out of His infinite love, God desired to draw near to man, as he seeks his own proper identity, and walk with him." ~ cf. Lk 24:15 in Donum Veritatis. Theologians are tasked with studying what God has revealed of Himself to us, and communicating the faith to all those who seek to know more.

I stumbled on a document, Donum Veritatis. Given in Rome on May 24, 1990, Donum Veritatis discussed the eccelesial vocation of the theologian. The theologian, or more specifically the Catholic theologian, places himself at the service of the Church. His role is to "pursue in a particular way an ever deeper understanding of the Word of God found in the inspired Scriptures and handed on by the living Tradition of the Church." He is also called to deepen his own faith life, continuously uniting his research with prayer. "Theology therefore offers its contribution so that that the faith might be communicated." (Donum Veritatis, #6-8)

Reading Donum Veritatis was both enlightening and comforting because it answered my questions about the "usefulness" of theology and confirmed a personal vocation to theology.

Curing Blindness

2009-10-11T07:30:00.003-04:00

Dusk, semi-rural Pennsylvania | Oct. 2009

"He spat on the ground and made mud with the saliva and spread the mud on the man's eyes, saying to him, "Go, wash in the pool of Siloam" (which means Sent). Then he went and washed and came back able to see."
~ John 9:6-7 (NRSV)

Very often in the most difficult times of our lives we can be diabolically tempted to doubt God's presence, His love for us, sometimes even His very existence - all because we cannot see why such things are permitted to happen to us. Just before He heals him, Jesus is discussing the state of this man with His disciples:

His disciples asked him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?" Jesus answered, "Neither this man nor his parents sinned; he was born blind so that God's work might be revealed in him." ~ John 9:2-3 (NRSV)

It's easy to think as his disciples did - we must have done something wrong to deserve this state. Wandering around in spiritual blindness while knowing others can see can tempt one to pity oneself, curse others around them, even curse God. Although I strive to hear God's voice and do His will, I don't always hear, can't always discern. Sometimes things go dark. I get tempted to pity myself, or envy the sight of others. Then I hear the words of Jesus:

"I am the light of the world." ~ John 9:5 (NRSV)

I frequently find myself in the place of the blind man, listening to Jesus spit on the ground and feeling him smear mud in my spiritual eyes. My blindness had overcome me and now it sounds like insult has been heaped upon my injury - someone spitting on my very blindness. The enemy will tempt us to cling to our pride and close our ears to the instructions that follow: "Go, wash in the pool". Trust, perseverance and humility are so necessary in such moments of closeness to the Lord - to listen to the instructions that follow. We know, as Christians, that God is Love - therefore anything that Jesus does for us is out of Love, no matter how it may appear to the eyes of this world.

21st century living: pain relief in a bottle

2009-09-14T07:00:00.006-04:00

I've watched lifestyles in 21st century America increasingly focus on "pain-free" living - from pharmaceuticals developing the latest pain killer or anti-depressant to dentists telling me how to spend $10,000 to ensure that my jaw will be virtually pain-free to consumer advertising focusing on products and experiences that make us "feel good."

I find this jarring - pain or suffering is often a part of life; obviously not a desirable state for us, but sometimes inevitable. Crosses, temporary or permanent, are a part of the journey Homeward. This journey does not consist in solely hunting down ways to make all of them go away. In the Christian sense, it means balancing between appropriate targets and integrating the rest with Calvary. It is also an exercise in love - can we, injured though we may be, still love as Christ did? It involves carrying our pain while expanding our hearts - we find that illustrated vividly in the examples of Jesus and Mary. Jesus' suffering and death on the Cross was His - however while carrying this cross and being nailed to it, His heart expanded to the whole world. Not just to the people of His time, but to everyone - past, present and future. Imagine that He put every drop of blood in His body, every painful wound, even His death, in the service of the human race: to heal and save. His Mother's heart broke as she witnessed the most painful and humiliating death for Her Son. Yet her heart also expanded as she carried that pain. That day she became the Mother of the whole world.

The end of pain and suffering (for those traveling Homeward) comes not in this life, but in the next:

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. You have faith in God; have faith also in me. In my Father's house there are many dwelling places. If there were not, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back again and take you to myself, so that where I am you also may be." ~ John 14:1-3

We are all invited, by God made man living among us, to travel this road Homeward. The road, however, is not strewn with an indefinite supply of pain killers, medical procedures, anti-aging cosmeceuticals, video games, movies, shopping experiences, or travel get-aways. It is, simply put, guided by Love:

"Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For our knowledge is imperfect and our prophecy is imperfect; but when the perfect comes, the imperfect will pass away." ~ 1 Corinthians 13:1-8

How does your garden grow?

2009-07-31T11:40:00.006-04:00

Sunflower, back porch

I love having some earth around the house - helping things grow relaxes the mind, guides one back to true north. When I'm working the garden I'm vividly reminded how brilliantly designed the seeds are. All I do is prep the ground, water, prune, and weed. Then I wait. The rest is accomplished with sun and grace. Last year the zucchini plants were drowned out - this year they are producing nicely. The squirrels ate all my tarragon this time, so I don't have those in the garden. But I do have others - tomatoes, sunflowers, herbs. Great stuff. Enjoy the pics!

Heirloom tomatoes, south side

Roma tomatoes, south side

Basil

Musical underpinnings

2009-07-25T20:29:00.007-04:00

Double bass cello, bridge detail

On Thursday I attended a performance of Gounod Messe Solennelle de Sainte-Cécile, Saint-Saëns Symphony No. 3 in C minor Op. 78, “Organ Symphony” by a French Canadian youth orchestra and choir. It was beautifully done. The arrangement of players caught my eye - violinists front and center, wind instruments surrounding violins, and off to the far side were a double-bass cello and kettle drums. Most people didn't notice them playing because they were so far from center stage. The young kettle drum player played with one hand (his left arm was broken and in a cast), striking sharply with the stick in his right hand and softly stroking the membrane with his fingertips. Similarly the double-bass player alternated between bold bow strokes and precise, delicate plucks on the strings at different moments.

Although these two players were little noticed, the undertones of their music held the rest of the pieces together - like a deep, cohesive, unifying force for the diverse collection of instruments (string, wind, brass, voice, percussion). Without them the orchestra would have sounded dry, brittle, and a little glassy.

In this realization I was gently reminded of the Holy Spirit's presence in my life. He too, alternates between sharp, bold strikes upon my soul and soft, gentle touches in my heart. In the general noise of my life, though, if I'm not paying attention I will miss His voice entirely. He speaks to my heart in deep, musical tones, which, once acknowledged, truly reverberate through my entire being. Without Him my own existence is dry, brittle, fragile. With Him, though, I have endless energy, focus and power on whatever He moves me to do. With the Father and the Son, He is the life of my soul; the Son is my daily food. God truly does sustain me on my earthly Journey Home. What a comfort in such harsh economic and political times as this.

Reflections from martial arts

2009-07-19T06:59:00.007-04:00

After having spent time at our annual international training camp in martial arts, I am vividly reminded of why I continue to study it, even at times when my health gets in the way. The lessons I learn there carry over into my everyday life. The dojo is a primordial laboratory - in our quest to perfect our understanding of the art of self-defense, we also strive to perfect our character. A moral code (Bushido) holds us to truly studying the meaning of "appropriate response", which is critical when learning self-defense from moderate to lethal attacks. As a karate-ka I have learned to appreciate the somewhat paradoxical condition of the human body: although shockingly vulnerable to injury (consider the vital targets along the center line), it is also capable of generating enormous power (e.g., using the hips in throws, strikes and kicks).

Most of the people I know who do not practice at a dojo think of super-soldiers when we talk about martial arts or self-defense training. Our karate roots, however, which are Okinawan, go back to a time when poor farmers or villagers had nothing to defend themselves but their bare hands or simple farm tools - hence the birth of "karate" (empty hand) & use of such things as tonfa (which was an agricultural tool) and bo (which may have been used to balance heavy loads on the shoulders). It is in our greatest moments of weakness where we learn to develop unbelievable strength.

As a Catholic this dovetails with my journey Home. I am a fragile creature; this corruptible body is destined to die. Yet death is not the end of my existence. The total surrender of my mortality to God yields the fruit of unimaginable strength: resurrection. My immortal soul will be reunited with my resurrected body - it will be incorruptible; no longer vulnerable to injury, hunger, or death; capable of moving at the speed of thought; able to pass through any matter; perpetually lit with the refulgence of the beatific vision. My lessons in the dojo complement my study of my faith - where possible I use the two lessons together on the path Home.

Midsummer morn

2009-07-11T08:27:00.004-04:00

July 2009 | Boston, MA

It's a gorgeous midsummer morning, here in Boston. The birds have been chirping since about 5:30am and it's a balmy 65 degrees out there. So far the weather has been amazing - highs never above 75 on average and on a morning like this one, friendly warm sunshine piercing the cool chill in the air. What a perfect summer day.

Weightless

2009-07-08T06:51:00.006-04:00

I went to adoration yesterday a little earlier than usual to avoid the game crowds in the city. The shrine was exceptionally quiet and still when I went in. I remember being a little tired, feeling a little "heavy" of heart given the uncertainties surrounding my immediate future.

For some reason the gospels had been calling to me most of the afternoon so I brought my copy of scripture to read. I began with Matthew. Some passages passed over me, but others struck me to the heart, like the soft barbs of pollen hitching a ride on an unsuspecting traveler's clothes. I wrote those down. There was one passage that made me sit back and close my eyes:

"Do not be anxious about your life, what you shall eat or what you shall drink, nor about your body, what you shall put on. Your heavenly Father knows you need them all. Seek first his kingdom and righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day's own trouble be sufficient for the day." ~ Mt 6:25, 32 -34, RSV

I had become very still - so still that I forgot that I was breathing. I no longer felt the beat of my heart against my ribs; I didn't feel my legs on the bench, or the back of the pew against my shoulders. It was as if the Father plucked me from my seat to hold me in His hand and peer at me with love - a weightless, light-filled moment.

Then without warning I was plunged back into reality, the cold of a breeze from the window whacking my side, the hardness of the wood piercing my sore bones, and the pain of my muscles once again returning to settle deep into my frame. I opened my eyes to see the blur of my surroundings go past me for a split second, and suddenly I was back in my seat. I had been shoved back into my original position. I looked at my watch - 20 minutes had gone by.

Something was changed within me. My heart, which earlier felt heavy and sealed shut, was now lighter and more open - like someone had opened the doors within me to let a breeze in. The future no longer looked so frightening.

Then a scripture passage popped into my mind:

Jesus said:
"Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened,
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am meek and humble of heart;
and you will find rest for yourselves.
For my yoke is easy, and my burden light." (Mt 11: 18-20, NAB)

How true that was.

Eat + drink (His flesh + blood) = Eternal life

2009-07-03T10:40:00.014-04:00

Pope John Paul II with Blessed Sacrament

"This teaching is difficult; who can accept it?" ~ John 6:60 (NRSV)

It's funny how often I hear this protest against Catholicism here in 21st century America and around the world. Over 2,000 years ago, Jesus revealed the source and key to eternal life:

"Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood have eternal life, and I will raise them up on the last day; for my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink." ~ John 6:54-55 (NRSV)

Seems pretty simple - albeit a bit shocking or revolting, if you consider what was being proposed. Yet it is what we Catholics do every time we attend Mass and take communion. Understandably, the response then is identical to what we hear now - this teaching is difficult; who can accept it? When I dig a little deeper into these words, I realize that this step actually resides ahead of a series of smaller steps.

The prerequisite to literally eating Jesus' body and blood is a personal fiat to His invitation:

"This is my body, which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of me...This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in my blood." ~ Luke 22:19, 20 (NRSV)

The prerequisite to making that personal fiat is to follow His commandment:

"This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you." ~ John 15:12-14 (NRSV)

The prerequisite to following His commandment is to follow Him:

"If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will find it." ~ Matthew 16:24-25 (NRSV)

So what then would be the prerequisite to following Him? My experience with "following" is that I don't usually follow someone (whether it's at work, in my martial arts training or in prayer) unless I trust and know that person quite well - the stronger my relationship with someone, the more likely I am to follow that person. One can only imagine the strength of the relationship between a man and woman bound in holy matrimony then, to remain with each other until separated by death.

It is beyond my imaginative powers to know the level of intimacy I experience with God. I know that He knew me before I existed; He fashioned me in my mother's womb, stationing an angel with me to guard and protect my immortal soul until it separates from my mortal body in death; and I know that He desires me - a complete union with me that goes far beyond what anyone else can offer.

Communion, then, becomes the most intimate union a human being can experience with God here on earth. Eating His flesh and drinking His blood, consuming His body, blood, soul and divinity, affects our bodies in a way that will be revealed at our resurrection, when our immortal souls will be reunited with our resurrected (and therefore immortal) bodies.

All of a sudden Jesus' cryptic invitation reveals the passionate love He has for each of us:

"Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood have eternal life, and I will raise them up on the last day; for my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink." ~ John 6:54-55 (NRSV)

How then can I not trust and want to know such a one who lived and died for love of me? The next step (to follow Him) no longer seems as difficult as I imagined.

The taste of scrolls

2009-07-01T20:22:00.007-04:00

I was at adoration tonight and experienced a particularly 'sweet' rosary in community. It was surprising because praying the rosary is difficult for me (as is most verbal prayer) - I can get stir-crazy with the repetition. My usual preference is silence, stillness, and nothing but the echoes of my heart sounding its calls to God.

Tonight as we prayed the rosary the words of each prayer seemed to roll off my tongue with a distinct sweetness - as if I was being helped along by my angel to enter the prayer contemplatively within the active form. Perhaps also it was the company of people I joined as well - two Oblates (OMV) - one priest and one seminarian, both good friends of mine, people I feel very much at home with.

Then a quote from the Book of Revelation came to mind:

"And I took the little scroll from the hand of the angel and ate it; it was sweet as honey in my mouth, but when I had eaten it my stomach was made bitter." ~ Revelation 10:10

It occurred to me that the scroll represents the gift of prophecy - and its dual nature (sweetness in the mouth, bitterness in the stomach) is a metaphor for our human existence: an immortal soul bound to a mortal body. A certain "bitterness" exists when the immortal is inextricably bound to the mortal; the incorruptible bound to what is corruptible. The "sweetness" is that deep knowledge that our immortal souls will be reunited to our resurrected (and subsequently immortal) bodies, eternally embraced in the beatific vision.

All the prayers of the rosary, in particular the Our Father and Hail Mary, have prophecies encoded in them. The first half of each prayer recounts prophetic dialogues around Jesus and Mary. The second half of each prayer is a prophecy that alludes to our final moments - the hour of our death. We ask for the grace to persevere in that fated hour because we know that will be the time of greatest temptation to doubt God's love and mercy.

I'm grateful for that brief sweetness in prayer tonight. It was a welcome gift.

Examen

2009-06-27T06:41:00.004-04:00

It's been a rainy couple of weeks here in New England - rainy and unseasonably cold, making June a rather dreary month. I'm amazed at how grey skies can so adversely affect one's mood, particulary in the midst of trials - the foul weather sometimes makes my daily crosses seem heavier than they are. Last night, after experiencing a particularly dry holy hour at the Shrine and subsequently in a foul mood, I decided to pick up a book I hadn't read in a while: The Examen Prayer. I stopped on page 25 - an outline of the examen - and realized how poorly I had been praying this recently. As I revisited this prayer with more discipline, the burdens of my day lifted and hope and comfort replaced the once oppressive weight.

Here's the outline:

Transition: I become aware of the love with which God looks upon me as I begin this examen.

Step 1 (Gratitude): I note the gifts that God's love has given me this day, and I give thanksto God for them.

Step 2 (Petition): I ask God for an insight and a strength that will make this examen a work of grace, fruitful beyond my human capacity alone.

Step 3 (Review): With my God, I review the day. I look for the stirrings in my heart and the thoughts that God has given me this day. I look also for those that have not been of God. I review my choices in response to both, and throughout the day in general.

Step 4 (Forgiveness): I ask for the healing touch of the forgiving God who, with love and respect for me, removes my heart's burdens.

Step 5 (Renewal): I look to the following day and, with God, plan concretely how to live it in accord with God's loving desire for my life.

Transition: Aware of God's presence with me, I prayerfully conclude the examen.

The familiar peace of Jesus' presence once again visited my heart - and I was gently reminded not to worry about tomorrow - for the Lord would take care of that. My only task was to listen for His voice and respond wholeheartedly to His call.

Evangelization & Culture - transformation vs. domination

2009-06-21T06:34:00.010-04:00

Taken at Padre Pio Shrine
Barto, PA | 2007

I am often told that Christian evangelization is a cold attempt to dominate culture. It is unfortunate when such a message seems to be delivered by the behavior of some. John Paul II's message of evangelization was one of love, not domination - to bring Christ to all peoples is to reintroduce Love to His beloved; consider how Andrew found his brother Simon Peter and introduced him to Jesus (John 1:40-42):

Andrew, the brother of Simon Peter, was one of the two who heard John and followed Jesus. He first found his own brother Simon and told him, "We have found the Messiah" ²⁹ (which is translated Anointed). Then he brought him to Jesus.

In a similar fashion Philip, when called by Jesus, finds Nathaniel to share the news with him (John 1:44-46):

Now Philip was from Bethsaida, the town of Andrew and Peter. Philip found Nathanael and told him, "We have found the one about whom Moses wrote in the law, and also the prophets, Jesus, son of Joseph, from Nazareth." But Nathanael said to him, "Can anything good come from Nazareth?" Philip said to him, "Come and see."

In both cases friends or brothers wanted to share something special with the other, thus enabling the introductions. Neither Andrew nor Philip forced Peter or Nathanael - rather, they were invited to "come and see."

Jesus' own example of evangelization never violated another person's free will. A person was free to choose to follow Him and His Way or not (recall the story of the rich man who recoiled from Jesus' call because he didn't want to give up his riches). It is true that acceptance of His Way will have a transformative effect on one's own way of life, but it is not the Christian evangelizer who causes this - it is, rather, the Word Himself. The National Directory for Catechesis clearly states the relationship between the evangelizer and the culture being evangelized: "Those who proclaim the Christian message must know and love the culture and the people to whom they bring the message" (pg. 46).

In our image, after our likeness

2009-06-11T19:30:00.006-04:00

Over the past few years I've seen friends and relatives get married and have children, watching the little ones grow and develop into the unique people they are. The wonder on the parents' faces, particularly as they behold their newborns, seems to be a mixture of awe at seeing a child with their own features on his or her face and immense love and desire for that child's good, knowing that he or she has a very special, very unique destiny.

In many ways I think this is reminiscent of God's great love for every human being on the planet: those who were, those who are, and those who have not yet come to pass. The book of Genesis offers two stories of creation, the first with a profound insight into God's parental relationship with us:

"Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. Let them have domain over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, and the cattle, and over all the wild animals and all the creatures that crawl on the ground.' God created man in his image; in the divine image he created him; male and female he created them." ~ Genesis 1:26-27

If one contemplates the salvific plan that then unfolded through His son Jesus Christ, we see also that we are a gift to the Son of God, and that God desires us. Consider Jesus' prayer just before his arrest in the Gospel of John:

"Father, they are your gift to me. I wish that where I am they also may be with me, that they may see my glory that you gave me, because you loved me before the foundation of the world. Righteous Father, the world also does not know you, but I know you, and they know that you sent me. I made known to them your name and I will make it known, that the love with which you loved me may be in them and I in them." ~ John 17:24-26

Just as every good parent gives and desires very much the love of his or her children, so much more does God give of His Love and desire our love for Him. The experience of parenthood is such a gift because it is a profound lesson in the love the Trinity has for each of us, just multiplied infinitely.

An unexpected encounter

2009-05-28T20:25:00.008-04:00

Hovering over the groundhog's den

I was at Franklin Park Zoo today with some friends and noticed a peacock in the groundhog exhibit, hovering over one of the holes in anticipation. He stood motionless over the hole for several minutes, peering in very quietly. At first I thought the bird was going to make a snack of the poor animal, but even as it poked its head out from time to time, the bird never pecked at it. Instead whenever he peeked out, the peacock rather gently tried to nudge and coax it out. When the hedgehog finally did venture out of his hole, the peacock made a huge display of his feathers. It was beautiful.

This exchange reminds me of my relationship with God sometimes - He will often call to me, try to nudge and coax me out of my hiding place, reassuring me that all will be well. Sometimes I hide in my work, other times in my studies. Once in a while I peer heavenward, but only when I emerge completely from hiding can I take in His glory with all my senses. I think that's why Mass and adoration are so important to me - those are times when I emerge from hiding to be fully present to God.

At last

A Day at the Zoo | Mendon, MA

2009-05-15T12:06:00.004-04:00

Golden pheasant
May 2009

I spent a very enjoyable morning with friends at the zoo last Saturday. It's always good for me to just take a step back and enjoy creation, with all its colors, complexity and beauty - puts the worries of my own life back into perspective (they're not as problematic as they seem). I've included some pics of a few things I saw there. Enjoy!

The pork in the Boston Globe

2009-04-30T09:24:00.007-04:00

The Boston Globe has an "Articles of Faith" section and this morning's front page had several articles. A couple were on the Notre Dame scandal. I found the assortment of articles typical of the fast food media chain: heavy on the fat, low on the meat.

The very first article was unsurprising: a stumbling interview with Barack Obama on abortion and his intent to pass FOCA.

Way down at the bottom, between "Let's discuss married priests" and "Why do Americans change their faith?" was another piece on Harvard professor's Mary Ann Glendon's decline of Notre Dame's Laetare Medal. I thought the letter was well written: thoughtful, poised and polite.

Both Obama and Glendon agree that abortion is a moral and ethical issue - however, Obama seems to waffle back and forth between not taking a stance ("I think they are in a better position to make these decisions ultimately than members of Congress or a president of the United States, in consultation with their families, with their doctors, with their doctors, with their clergy.") and imposing his own "morals" on the American people ("I would like to reduce the number of unwanted presidencies that result in women feeling compelled to get an abortion, or at least considering getting an abortion, particularly if we can reduce the number of teen pregnancies, which has started to spike up again."). However he doesn't offer an explanation for the merit of his goals (reducing unwanted and/or teen pregancies).

Glendon, on the other hand, very clearly indicates her reasons for her decision regarding Notre Dame:

"First, as a longtime Consultant to the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, I could not help but be dismayed by the news that Notre Dame also planned to award the President an honorary degree. This, as you must know, was in disregard of the U.S. Bishops’ express request of 2004 that Catholic institutions "should not honor those who act in defiance of our fundamental moral principles" and that such persons "should not be given awards, honors or platforms which would suggest support for their actions." That request, which in no way seeks to control or interfere with an institution's freedom to invite and engage in serious debate with whomever it wishes, seems to me so reasonable that I am at a loss to understand why a Catholic university should disrespect it."

The insults, jeering and idiocy of certain comments on her letter (see the Boston Globe's article comments section) are also unsurprising - they come from people who claim "tolerance" and are remarkably intolerant of Catholics who want the freedom to practice their faith.

God in the Streets

2009-04-20T13:12:00.003-04:00

Grassroots films has been putting out some really riveting stuff. I saw this last night:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NX5X2cXMh0o

Check out their latest film trailer for The Human Experience:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahLem-krZe4

I'm looking forward to watching The Human Experience soon. Their channel can be found here:
http://www.youtube.com/user/GrassrootsFilms

Grass of the field

2009-04-16T12:39:00.003-04:00

Flowers
April 2009

"You belong in the field." That was the response I heard to my prayer in the abbey yesterday when I asked if the Lord was calling me to monastic life. It seemed as if a resounding bell had rung in my ears when I recognized that my call to apostolic work is stronger than my desire for the life of a hermit in the Benedictine tradition. Obviously I'll bring this back to prayer with me on retreat next week but it seems as if my path suddenly got a bit more defined.

The Rubrics of Easter Vigil Mass

2009-04-11T10:47:00.004-04:00

I've been studying the rubrics of Easter Vigil Mass because I'll be serving at one tonight. Using the Daily Roman Missal, here's what I found:

It's arranged in 4 parts:

Service of Light
Liturgy of the Word
Liturgy of Baptism
Liturgy of the Eucharist

Some particulars one should note:

Service of Light
All the lights in the church are put out and a large fire is prepared outside the church - this is where the Easter candle will be lit. After the fire is blessed the Easter candle takes its light from the new fire - preparation of the candle is really beautiful - a cross is cut into the wax, the Greek letter alpha is traced above it, omega below it, and a certain set of numbers to signify Jesus' dominion over time, accompanied by the following prayer:

"Christ yesterday and today; the beginning and the end; Alpha and Omega; all time belongs to him; all the ages; to him be glory and power; through every age forever. Amen; By his holy and glorious wounds may Christ our Lord guard us and keep us. Amen."

Liturgy of the Word
Nine readings are assigned to the Easter Vigil - seven from the Old Testament and two from the New Testament. We begin with Genesis, progress through Exodus, Isaiah, Ezekiel, and land on Romans before heading into the Gospel.

Liturgy of Baptism
Those who have been preparing for Baptism (RCIA) are baptized at this time. The faithful members of the congregation also renew their baptismal promises, led by the priest.

Liturgy of the Eucharist
This begins in the usual way. The missal states that it is fitting that the bread and wine be brought forward by the newly baptized.

I'm looking forward to Easter Vigil tonight - the climax of our holiest of seasons. Peace.

Spring's here, summer's around the corner

2009-04-10T22:45:00.003-04:00

House finch | Biddeford, ME
2007

I noticed last week how much the robins and other birds have been singing in the mornings - what a contrast to the colder winter months when I'd be lucky if I heard a single chirp at dawn. It's great to sense summer coming after the cold months here; winter can seem a bit too long in New England, especially with the spats of bone-chilling wind and crazy snowstorms. Bring on the warm weather and sunshine!

I look for the resurrection of the dead: do you?

2009-04-10T09:31:00.012-04:00

If you're a practicing Roman Catholic, "we look for the resurrection of the dead" should sound familiar - we recite it at Mass every week in the Nicene Creed. What does this mean? The Catechism (#997-998) describes how we will rise and who will rise:

#997: "God, in his almighty power, will definitively grant incorruptible life to our bodies by reuniting them with our souls, through the power of Jesus' Resurrection."

#998: "All the dead will rise, 'those who have done good, to the resurrection of life, and those who have done evil, to the resurrection of judgment.'"

As we enter Good Friday I am reminded that death is not the end - it is only the beginning.

Fast food media will go the way of McD's

2009-04-04T07:43:00.006-04:00

CNN's headlines

April 4, 2009

There's a reason why I stopped consuming news from fast food outlets like CNN, BBC, Boston Globe, and the news morning shows, both online and offline - they feed me 90% junk, 10% substance. For example when I saw the splash page of CNN, the most real-estate was taken up by (other than the ads) the goings-on of some star of a hit reality-TV show that I never watch. The headlines were littered with 'fatty' substance items about entertainment celebrities, the First Lady's "fashion faux pas" and other such nonsense given elevated status because that's apparently at top of mind for Americans today. These sites often leave me scratching my head wondering, "Where's the meat?"

As we progress further into 21st century America, I think we'll see a more significant shift towards niche news outlets and those online news houses that let a user set up his/her own news feeds "just the way I like it" - less junk, more substance. My top two types of news sites these days are the general all-purpose news outlets that allow me to mine topics (like Yahoo!, Google, and some international news sites to balance the American media bias) and my "niche" news (like Catholic.org, Red Herring, and trade magazines). When I compare just two sites (CNN vs. Catholic.org), one certainly looks way more "appetizing" for consumption than the other because one has more substance - coverage of issues that are personally more relevant - than the other.

Catholic.org's headlines
April 4, 2009

Comparing Sts. Francis & Bonaventure

2009-03-31T09:54:00.007-04:00

A study of St. Francis’ The Later Rule and St. Bonaventure’s Itinerarium Mentis in Deum reveals a contrast between St. Francis' practical, normative style and St. Bonaventure's philosophical, descriptive style in the approach to spirituality, though both were "Franciscan".

In general, St. Francis tends to be concise and specific in his recommendations, where St. Bonaventure takes a philosophical (and lengthier), descriptive approach to his work.

Francis’ practicality is evident throughout The Later Rule, from permitting individuals entering community to dispose of their own belongings as each sees fit, to ensuring that health isn’t endangered during fasts. The normative tone in his work speaks to the common good of the congregation, and he balances his instruction to obey one’s superiors with instruction to superiors themselves, particularly in how they should admonish, correct or impose penance on their brothers.

Bonaventure moves away from Francis’ style in Itinerarium and cultivates a philosophy of spirituality, taking on a style rooted in Plato. His description of the soul’s ascent to God is mingled with suggestions (“consider, therefore”, “the study…is most especially helpful”, “behold, if you can”); these suggestions, however, seem far from normative.

Though both saints are from the same spiritual house, St. Bonaventure being St. Francis’ successor, each uses a different prism to disperse the fruits of their contemplation: St. Francis in The Later Rule focusing on the common good and practical matters, with rather concise and specific instructions; St. Bonaventure in Itinerarium focusing on the individual’s ascent to God using a philosophical/descriptive approach.

Snoozing on Sts. Francis and Bonaventure

2009-03-28T13:30:00.004-04:00

March 2008

Yesterday I was muddling through a couple of pieces, St. Francis' Later Rule and St. Bonaventure's Itinerarium. After a couple of hours of reading I decided to get a cup of coffee - the picture above illustrates what I saw when I came back: the mutt, conked out on my papers. I guess no better place for an animal to lay its head than on St. Francis and Bonaventure, two of the biggest animal lovers I know around :)

Eucharistic Congress April 3-4 in Boston

2009-03-19T08:21:00.003-04:00

FYI - there's a great event going on in Boston over Palm Sunday weekend:

The Boston Eucharistic Congress for College Students and Young Adults will take place on the evening of Friday, April 3 and all day Saturday, April 4, 2009. This free event will be held in the historic North End of Boston, MA.

Visit their official website:
http://www.eucharisticcongress.org/index.php

Deus Caritas Est and Church/State

2009-03-16T12:27:00.009-04:00

The following is an adaptation of my midterm essay in Church History:

In light of recent developments in American politics one could easily argue that our President is not (and should not be) subordinate to the Church. Most Catholics should agree with this - especially if they've read Deus Caritas Est and understand the true role of the Church, which by the way is not to replace the State. The President is, however, obliged to hear the voices of American citizens, including those of us who are members of the Catholic Church – hence the freedom we enjoy to hold peaceful March for Life events and other expressions of protest when injustice is committed by his hand or other branches of our government. Granted he may not heed the call for justice by the Church, but it certainly remains the Church’s prerogative to explicitly promote the common good.

Deus Caritas Est (God is Love), Pope Benedict XVI, among other things, refines the distinction of the spheres of influence regarding Church and State:

“The Church cannot and must not take upon herself the political battle to bring about the most just society possible. She cannot and must not replace the State. Yet at the same time she cannot and must not remain on the sidelines in the fight for justice.”

His reasons for clarifying the different but interrelated roles of Church and State stem from Vatican II’s definition of the “autonomy of the temporal sphere,” namely, iterating the distinction between what belongs to Caesar and what belongs to God.

Pope Benedict XVI’s discussion of the role of Church does not end with a description of the parameters of power – it culminates with a call to love, “which will always prove necessary, even in the most just society.” He further acknowledges the reality of suffering in the midst of this interaction between Church and State:

“There will always be suffering which cries out for consolation and help. There will always be loneliness. There will always be situations of material need where help in the form of concrete love of neighbor is indispensible.”

The State’s job, however, is not necessarily to provide everything to everyone – Benedict offers a more nuanced perspective:

“We do not need a State which regulates and controls everything, but a State which, in accordance with the principle of subsidiarity, generously acknowledges and supports initiatives arising from the different social forces and combines spontaneity with closeness to those in need.”

Pope Benedict XVI’s clarification regarding the Church’s role relative to the state provides an update to Gelasius’ initial discourse (Letter to Emperor on Two Powers), at a time and place where lines of authority are increasingly blurred in a very heterogeneous society.

Refreshment in the Desert

2009-03-02T15:26:00.005-05:00

Peace lily
March 1, 2009

A scripture passage caught my attention this weekend:

"And Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan, and was led by the Spirit for forty days in the wilderness, tempted by the devil. And he ate nothing in those days; and when they were ended, he was hungry." - Luke 4:1-2 (RSV)

As I was pondering my next steps in this earthly journey (and growing somewhat restless at the quiet), it occurred to me that the Lord may be inviting me to visit with Him in the Desert - to endure the dryness in prayer, the anxieties in day to day life, and the pre-storm quiet in my discernment - with a spirit of fasting, asceticism, patience. And so I will surrender everything to be guided by His will as these desert days proceed.

Cold blossoms

2009-02-28T14:18:00.002-05:00

South Side of BPL
Feb. 28, 2009

I finally saw for myself what may have been making me sneeze all week: some buds seem to be getting fuzzier and fuzzier with each passing day. I saw this near the Public Library on the south side of Copley Square. Funny - it was nearly 50 degrees yesterday and we're bracing for some snow in the next couple of days. Such is life here in New England - warm, spring like temps, and then get smacked again with winter weather the next day!

Signs of Spring

2009-02-26T10:05:00.002-05:00

Goose tracks
February 2009

I've noticed a small gaggle of geese stopping by in the field across the street to graze. Yesterday as I was walking the dog I noticed their tracks near the trees. The ground was soft enough to take some great impressions. Spring seems to be peeking around the corner at us. Just a couple of weeks ago the ground was frozen solid!

Ash Wednesday

2009-02-25T11:57:00.003-05:00

St. Catherine Church, Ithaca (NY)
July 2008

Today marks the first day of Lent, a time of penance, alms giving, prayer and meditation as we progress over the next several weeks towards the climax of the season: the Passion, Death and Resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ. The day began in quiet cold with Mass at 7am. What would seem to the world an otherwise normal business day was in reality, for us, a day marked by death - the visible black ashes on our foreheads reminding us interiorly of our nature as mortals - as well of our future nature as immortal beings, with the admonition that now is the time for repentance and mercy.

Lessons from Sts. Benedict and Augustine

2009-02-24T14:52:00.006-05:00

As I studied the second age of the Church, or the Age of the Fathers last week, I noticed a pattern in my readings. Monastic developments in 4^th through 6^th century Rome and its provinces opened a unique space of reflection on the path Home: immersion in the spiritual life, a deep and ongoing dialogue with God. Both St. Benedict and St. Augustine traced several lessons in the spiritual journey, among them self-knowledge, mindfulness of a reckoning or judgment at the end of one's life, humility, and obedience.

Self-knowledge is one of many means to remain faithful to one’s baptismal promises and resist temptation (CCC #2340), thereby enabling a properly guided spiritual journey. St. Benedict’s first chapter of his rule is dedicated to identifying and defining the kinds of monks that exist. This served as a lesson to his fellow monks: know yourself and know the sort of monk you are to be.

St. Augustine explores many aspects of himself as He strives to draw closer to God:

“My Lord, every day my conscience makes confession, relying on the hope of your mercy as more to be trusted” (Confessions, X, iii).

He further identifies self-knowledge as a gift, in his dialogue with the Lord on the spiritual senses:

“Accordingly, let me confess what I know of myself. Let me confess too what I do not know of myself. For what I know of myself I know because you grant me light” (Confessions, X, v).

Mindfulness of a reckoning or judgment at the end of one’s life is admonished to the Christian pilgrim as a guide to prudence and special attention to one’s actions. Benedict warns Abbots not to “neglect or undervalue the welfare of the souls entrusted to him; let him always consider that he has undertaken the government of souls, of which he must give an account” (Rule of St. Benedict, Ch. II). Furthermore he mentions in Chapter IV among the instruments of good works: “(44) To fear the day of judgment.”

He punctuates that chapter by again reminding his brother monks of judgment:

“Behold, these are the instruments of the spiritual art, which, if they have been applied without ceasing day and night and approved on judgment day, will merit for us from the Lord that reward which He has promised” (Rule of St. Benedict, Ch. IV)

Even in the more sordid times of his life, St. Augustine was mindful of God’s coming judgment:

“Nothing kept me from an even deeper pool of erotic indulgence except fear of death and of your coming judgment which, through the various opinions I had held, never left my breast.” (Confessions, VI, xvi)

Humility is discussed at great length in St. Benedict’s Rule, particularly as it relates to the spiritual journey Home:

“Hence, brethren, if we wish to reach the greatest height of humility, and speedily to arrive at that heavenly exaltation to which ascent is made in the present life by humility, then, mounting by our actions, we must erect the ladder which appeared to Jacob in his dream, by means of which angels were shown to him ascending and descending.” (Rule of St. Benedict, Ch. VII)

The journey is likened to a ladder, of which our bodies and souls are the two sides and ascent occurs by humility, descent by pride. St. Benedict described the twelve degrees of humility in Chapter VII, which builds on self-knowledge (“Let a man consider that God always sees him and that the eye of God beholds his works everywhere”) and evolves into self-control and attentiveness to God’s presence in every moment, “thinking that he is already standing before the dread judgment seat of God.”

In considering his own defects and submitting himself to God and others for God’s sake, St. Augustine exhibits a humility that not only confirms the above but explicitly refers to his lowly opinion of himself light of those defects:

“From a hidden depth a profound self-examination had dredged up a heap of all my misery and set it ‘in the sight of my heart’ (Ps. 18:15).” (Confessions, VII, vii).

This humility enables him to seek even greater closeness to God, the ultimate goal of our spiritual journey:

“My love for you, Lord, is not an uncertain feeling but a matter of conscious certainty. With your word you pierced my heart, and I loved you” (Confessions, X, vi).

Obedience, in particular to God’s will, and operationally to the will of one’s superiors, is stressed as a critical means of imitating Christ. St. Benedict illustrates in his Rule:

“The second degree of humility is, when a man loves not his own will, nor is pleased to fulfill his own desires but by his deeds carries out that word of the Lord which says: ‘I came not to do My own will, but the will of Him who sent Me’ (Jn 6:38); the third degree of humility is, that for the love of God a man subject himself to a Superior in all obedience, imitating the Lord.”

These four lessons, self-knowledge, mindfulness of a reckoning or judgment, humility and obedience, are not mutually exclusive processes or events – rather they serve as stepping stones on the spiritual journey Home to God and Heaven, as indicated by both St. Benedict in his Rule and St. Augustine in his Confessions.

Critters: the cat

2009-02-22T20:55:00.003-05:00

The resident cat
Feb 2009

We live in community here and everyone learns to get along - including the animals. It's been fun watching how the animals negotiate boundaries and learn to co-exist peacefully. The cat has recently taken to making a beeline for my recliner whenever I'm sitting there working with my laptop. I've had to say "no" to her curling up in my lap b/c her claws are way too sharp, so she figured a compromise: cat sandwich in the little space between my leg and the arm of my chair. Looks a little uncomfortable here but she was purring the whole time. Enjoy!

Nine minute documentary: March for Life

2009-02-22T09:51:00.001-05:00

The Oblates of the Virgin Mary documented their experience of the March for Life this year with people from St. Clement Shrine and beyond. The link to the YouTube video can be found here.

It's outstanding. Enjoy!

Cabrini

Prelude to Lent

2009-02-18T21:40:00.003-05:00

Neighborhood tree
Jan 2009

Lent begins next week. This year I wanted to make whatever sacrifice I offered during Lent serve as a gift for someone else; I was reminded that underprivileged children with hair loss for any reason often go without, unless they get a prosthetic donated by someone with hair. I decided to offer up my hair as a Lenten penance and donated 10" to Locks of Love. The decision was easy. The aftermath, a little more challenging. My short hair is too short to pull back into a ponytail so I'm going to have to wait a couple of months - just in time for Easter.

Quiet beginnings

2009-02-03T19:26:00.002-05:00

Sunrise
January 2009

The mornings here have been different this week - quiet, still, and occasionally empty. Yet in that emptiness and stillness I'm finding a space for renewed dialogue with the Lord. It's not the same as adoration because I'm not confined to the cold space of the shrine; I'm immersed in His creation. While I love the intimacy of adoration, there's also something about nature that stirs a chord deep within my heart - an almost tangible love letter that can be read in the flourishes of the sunrise or the robin eating berries from a winter branch. The limits of my imagination are put to flight when I'm immersed in nature, while adoration within the stone walls of the shrine stills the waters of my mind.

Beginning and end

2009-01-29T18:55:00.000-05:00

Boston, MA
January 2009

This weekend my best friend will be going to seminary to begin his preparation for the priesthood. I will miss him and all the time we spent hanging out, discussing a variety of topics, exploring zoos and local shrines, hiking, praying together, going to Mass, and cooking meals with the community. I will miss watching how much my dog loved playing with him, and just having his quiet and supportive presence in my day to day life.

However, I am at the same time excited and hopeful that he is answering his call - fulfilling what God created him to be. I know that he and I will remain the best of friends. But now is the time for him to train, to be formed, forged and shaped into a divine instrument - and that sometimes requires the crucible of separation, solitude, pain, and homesickness.

The nice thing is that where he's going, I will also be for Mass and prayer, so it's not goodbye for good, it's just goodbye for now. May God bless him and grant him peace and grace.

Wrentham, MA | Silence and prayer

2009-01-18T12:54:00.002-05:00

Orchard near Mt. St. Mary's Abbey
January 2009

I spent a week with the Cistercians to immerse myself in their monastic life and test a potential call there. It was good, intense. I still have a lot to unpack - but I can say that it spoke resonantly with the part of me that seeks and desires solitude, silence and rhythm in the day that revolves around the Eucharist and prayer. The schedule (3am - 8pm) was a little challenging - my body didn't seem to like being awake at 3am, but I got used to it. More to come later.

Departures, beginnings

2009-01-04T17:40:00.007-05:00

Sunset over Cayuga Lake
July 2008

As I get older, I discover that I become more tangibly acquainted with death. Since the age of 17 I have been visited by the deaths of friends and family from tragic accidents, violence, and most of all cancer: relatives, teachers, close friends, parents of friends. Most recently I was saddened by the loss of a great teacher - someone who for many years I saw as a role model of generosity and leadership. The news came at a time when I was grappling with several "fires" - internally and externally. It also came while I was in the midst of working on my own will over the past several days - a bittersweet reminder that my expiration date, though certain to occur, remains unknown to me as to the time and manner of departure from this life. This knowledge prompts me to live fully each day as if it were my last - and to thank God for the extra day that He has given me, should I find myself alive at the end of it. I better finish that will.

Departures of my friends and family in death also remind me that I have my own path to walk, sometimes with others, but many times alone with the Lord and His Mother. Next week I go to live with the Cistercians (a monastic community) for several days to test a potential call to that life. It will be an exploratory experience mingled with joyful anticipation at the thought of greater intimacy in prayer with God, some grief at the loss of loved ones in my life, and questions directed at God about where He would like me to go from here. I know that the discussion of departures and new beginnings will be quite salient for me within the walls of the monastery as I think and pray about my destiny, and decide on next steps on the other side of my visit.

Peace

2008-12-24T18:34:00.005-05:00

Cross of St. Benedict
December 2008

My favorite part of this cross (next to the corpus) is the mnemonic inscription: V R S N S M V - S M Q L I V B, which stands for Vade retro Satana! Nunquam suade mihi vana! Sunt mala quae libas. Ipse venena bibas! (="Begone Satan! Never tempt me with your vanities! What you offer me is evil. Drink the poison yourself!").

St. Benedict is a dear personal patron of peace - I like this prayer because it reminds me that evil does not rule in the order of things - it remains subordinate (and inferior) to the Divine.

Storm

2008-12-20T18:37:00.004-05:00

Evening Snow

December 2008

We got slammed with 10-12" of snow. The snow blower got plenty of time in the parking lot and driveway, more than once. Our roads have been a bit treacherous because the snow has been piling up on the road faster than the salt can melt it. Still made it to Mass this morning, though it took a little longer to get there. Tomorrow will be interesting - heavy snow, followed by a mix of rain and sleet.

Spring in winter

2008-12-19T17:27:00.003-05:00

Peering into a lily
December 2008

Given the snowstorm we're getting today I decided to get some lilies so that we'd have reminders of Spring in the house. They do a great job of making the snowy darkness outside seem less so.

Winter is here

2008-12-11T21:33:00.002-05:00

Cold branches

December 2008

We had our first taste of snow last weekend - not enough to call real accumulation, but enough to coat the ground with white stuff. The weather has been strange - ranging from frigid (teens) to downright warm (60 degrees Fahrenheit). Winter seems to be settling in - the last bits of Fall are disappearing now. We will be in deep freeze until at least April/May - sunlight is getting scarcer (we barely see it at 6:30am and it runs from us around 4:30pm).

Austrian Meal

2008-11-28T07:11:00.002-05:00

Duling Kurtz House
Exton, PA 2008

This year we enjoyed our Thanksgiving meal at a quaint Austrian House and Inn, where the meals were prepared by chefs trained abroad in Austria. I chose the shrimp and scallops - they were delicious. The presentation was so interesting that I thought I'd share what I saw. Enjoy!

Shrimp and Scallops
DKH 2008

Transitions

2008-11-11T06:24:00.003-05:00

Trees
October 2008

The leaves dropped this week - they're all over the streets now. The weather has been bouncing back and forth between mild and chilly, but it seems like it will settle to chilly in a couple of weeks. It's a bittersweet reminder that summer is finally over, and fall is transitioning to winter. The coming months will be an adjustment to a variety of changes - a new President, a different world market, and even changes in the Church like the change of liturgical seasons: we'll be shifting to Advent soon.

Food fun

2008-11-01T08:08:00.003-04:00

Dinner
October 2008

Our house had a small birthday dinner for one of our residents. We decided to cook up a combination of Korean and Japanese food. It was great. Homemade dumplings, ginger pasta, marinaded beef, all kinds of veggies, and of course the seaweed. The cake was our good friend Poppin' Fresh - an inside joke for Casa AC residents. I was laughing so hard icing the cake that you can see squiggles where I couldn't make a straight line. Enjoy!

Oh Hello, Poppin' Fresh!
October 2008

Quiet afternoon

2008-10-25T21:01:00.004-04:00

Geese and Trees
October 2008

Shortly after lunch I decided to take a brief walk in the mild weather. I didn't think I'd see many birds at this time of day but I happened to stumble on a gaggle of geese resting near some trees. They were peaceful until one of them spotted a dog - and they all quickly lined up near the water, in case they needed to jump in. The dog left them alone - so they stayed dry.

Warily eyeing the dog

Island within the pond

2008-10-19T13:36:00.003-04:00

Canadian geese
October 2008

There's a tiny island within the pond near my house. Geese love to settle there in the afternoons to take in some sun - these three were just getting out of the water and preening. Enjoy!

Dying

2008-10-17T19:11:00.006-04:00

Foliage

October 2008

Autumn is my favorite season - the colors, the weather, the time of year - all come together with an almost magical quality that infuses me with energy and hope. When I was young Fall was all about starting school, playing in giant leaf piles after the raking was done, and going horseback riding with my mom. As I got older, I learned that the leaves change colors because they are dying. I also discovered that death is often thought of something horrific and to be avoided. Yet, it is in our nature as human beings to die - we must die before we can be resurrected. The season of autumn reminds me to surrender my mortal nature to God, and comforts me with the knowledge that death will be followed by something beautiful, more beautiful than the colors I see before me - I will see my Creator, the love of my soul, face to face.

Repose

2008-10-15T20:46:00.002-04:00

Gabe
Oct. 2008

I woke this morning with a sense of peace, a bit of a surprise after a somewhat bizarre evening the night before. Mass this morning was punctuated by a sense of complete surrender to God's will in my life, regarding both my crosses and my joys. My dog often reminds me of the beauty of surrender to the present moment, in contrast with my tendency to worry about the future. Gabe managed to get to my blanket before I did and created quite the comfortable nest for himself in this picture. Enjoy!

Encircled

2008-10-05T21:48:00.005-04:00

Juvenile Robin
July 2008

There are times when I feel like the little robin here - a soul trapped, encircled by life, and unable to comprehend that in reality I am being led to safety. Once I take flight again, only then do I realize that the Lord carried me in His hand, freeing me from entanglements and helping me continue on my path Homeward.

In the end I desire one thing:

"Probe me, God, know my heart; try me, know my concerns. See if my way is crooked, then lead me in the ancient paths." ~ Psalm 139: 23-24.

Happy Feast of St. Therese!

2008-09-30T19:52:00.002-04:00

St. Therese Relics
August 2008

On the eve of St. Therese's feast day, I thought I'd share a couple of my favorite quotes of hers:

"Jesus needs neither books nor Doctors of Divinity in order to instruct souls; He, the Doctor of Doctors, He teaches without noise of words."

"Without love, deeds, even the most brilliant, count as nothing."

Enjoy!

Roads

2008-09-27T05:41:00.002-04:00

Sonderman Park
Sept. 2008

It's been a while since posting something - the craziness of daily life took over my schedule like some hurricane blowing through. I was thinking about my time in the mountains earlier this month and recalled how easy it was to make the time to walk every day through the hills or parks; and how this past week I was lucky to even get out of the office for a walk around the block. The balance of personal time and work can be so fragile. My lesson this week: slow down, get back to priorities, personal and spiritual, and don't try to carry the world's work - ever.

Beaver bites

2008-09-06T17:43:00.004-04:00

Fallen tree, Sondermann Park
September 2008

I saw about half a dozen fallen trees like the one above near a beaver dam - wonder if this was lunch at one point. Below is a view of the dam from behind. Beaver dams always do seem to have a bit of a mess around them; I guess that's just their way!

Behind the beaver dam

September 2008

CO 2008 | By the dirt road

2008-09-05T23:43:00.005-04:00

Roadside wildflowers, Colorado Springs
September 2008

There are times when I forget how close beauty is to me, especially as I look to the horizon for my next photograph. As I walked back from taking some more mountain pictures, my eyes were drawn to the dirt and gravel road. What I had passed in haste earlier I suddenly discovered on the road home. These wildflowers were too small for me to notice before - I could have crushed them under my feet in haste. When I finally paused for a moment to look, I realized how beautiful they were, even in their smallness.

View of mountains from Uintah Road, looking SW
September 2008

Mandala

2008-09-04T18:11:00.003-04:00

Feminine beauty
September 2008

While working with symbols and archetypes on retreat, I was asked by my director to draw what "feminine beauty" looks like to me - the blank paper I was given had one circle drawn on it, the outline of which is now visible in the drawing. This is what came to mind.

Face in the sky

2008-09-03T22:03:00.005-04:00

Cloud Formation

September 2008

Clouds have always fascinated me - they can take such distinct shapes one moment and completely disappear the next. They are a collection of water and gas, yet they look so solid. Our imaginations tend to enjoy running away with them too. I didn't notice this until I pulled it up on my computer; it looks like a face peering out at me.

Red rumped bee

2008-09-01T12:48:00.003-04:00

Colorado Springs
August 2008

I had to do a double take when I saw this bee - little red rump. Never saw anything like it. But there it is. Go figure.

CO 2008 | Colorado Springs

2008-08-31T18:16:00.003-04:00

Desert flower, Sondermann Park
August 2008

Spending some vacation time in Colorado Springs - biggest surprise to me was the desert plants that grow here - cactus, aloe, etc. Temps here are in the 80s during the day and 50s at night, pretty wide swing. I'll post a few more pics here as the week progresses.

Homegrown snack

2008-08-25T21:23:00.004-04:00

Sunflower seeds, August 2008

Sunflowers, July 2008

The patience paid off! We started some sunflowers in late May from seed - by July they were in full bloom, and tonight we harvested the seeds - what a great cycle. Very tasty!

Monastic doors

2008-08-24T17:25:00.004-04:00

The old well

August 2008

I spent a monastic weekend with the Cistercians and really enjoyed my time there. The rhythm appeals to me - partially nocturnal, this community begins each day at 3am with vigils (prayer) and ends with compline at 7:10pm; work consists of a number of things, from making candy to tending the sheep and cleaning/cooking meals. Spiritually the experience can be very intense - the silence and stillness in prayer, chant, and ascetism - all contribute to opening a space of communion between God and creature. I have a ton to unpack from this experience.

MA 2008 | Summer walk

2008-08-20T05:56:00.003-04:00

"Poetry and Patriotism give of their laurel and oak from
which Erin (Ireland) weaves a wreath for her heroes"
John Boyle O'Reilly Memorial
August 2008

Boston is rich with some historical tributes, many of them quietly sitting in parks and niches waiting to be recognized. I pass by almost daily this memorial to John Boyle O'Reilly, Irish-born Catholic poet and novelist. He was an agent for Catholic progress in America, particularly here in MA, where he lived and died.

Shade of purple

2008-08-17T22:59:00.003-04:00

Rose of Sharon
August 2008

I came across a pretty purple hibiscus flower while walking through Boston today. It was a pleasant surprise in the midst of city life to see something so beautiful among the wire fences, concrete, and cars, skyscrapers, and city noises. Enjoy!

Little peace lily blooms

2008-08-17T11:35:00.002-04:00

Peace Lily Plant
August 2008

This peace lily was pint-sized when I got it in 2004 after the seminarian scholarship dinner. Its leaves were singed by the candles and the whole plant was shriveled. I didn't think it'd survive. For 4 years it never bloomed. This year around Aug. 15, I saw the first bloom, so I had to take a snap. Enjoy!

RI 2008 | St. Therese Shrine

2008-08-09T20:40:00.004-04:00

Michael the Archangel | Harrisville, RI
August 2008

My friends and I took a brief road trip to Rhode Island and visited the first shrine to be dedicated to St. Therese in the Americas: the Shrine of the Little Flower. Once there we met Sr. Grace, who takes care of the place. Their little museum was filled with artifacts and relics, carrying wonderful stories with them, which Sr. Grace passed on to us. Great trip.

Relics of St. Therese
August 2008

City Flowers

2008-08-06T20:22:00.002-04:00

On the steps of a city church
Seattle, August 2008

I saw these delicate little flowers growing near the steps of a small city church in Seattle. They were a gentle reminder to me of God's presence in the smallest of things ~ my heart and eyes were drawn to the light bouncing off their subtle colors. It was His way of saying, "I see you, do You see me?"

Gazing eastward

2008-08-05T16:43:00.002-04:00

Early Morning Sun
Campion Hall, Seattle University
August 2008

Every once in a while the light outside mixes with the clouds to form a fleeting palette of beauty. I was having some breakfast with friends and waiting for my airport ride, around 7am, when someone remarked at how pretty the clouds were. Looking out, I hastily went to my room down the hall and took out my camera. Just as the clouds moved over the church steeples in the distance I took the shot. And then they were gone. This was taken from the dorm room I stayed at for the International Kokondo Seminar.

Restless Robin

2008-07-30T21:26:00.006-04:00

Juvenile Robin
July 2008

Earlier this evening we saw a little robin struggling in our tomatoes. Wondering what was going on, we followed him and noticed him scuttle under the back porch. Thinking it was going to be ok, maybe just a little injured, we left it alone and had dinner. A couple hours later one of our housemates wanted to check on it and we discovered it plopped down in her roses. At this point I was thinking that it might have broken its leg. So I got out the gloves and caught him, placing him carefully in a paper bag with some leaves and branches. We drove over to Angell Memorial, great people, who had a look at it and said he was ok, probably just too tired to fly and wings not fully developed. We were given the green to put him back and hopefully have a quiet night without becoming the local cats' midnight snack.

When we came home, I reached in to get him, but he escaped and flew around the kitchen, dropping a poop bomb on the floor and crashing into our coffee maker and dish rack. I finally caught him, and another housemate got a snap of the little guy just before I released him into our front yard (I figured that was the safest place to put him, since we never really see the cats there, yet still close enough to where we found him).

MA 2008 | Rockport

2008-07-26T20:40:00.007-04:00

Rockport, MA

July 2008

Most people think of deep blue water, rocks, boats, and shorelines when they hear about Rockport, MA. Indeed, there is a plentiful supply of such; however I was delightfully surprised to discover an abundance of color in the flowers there. Here are just a few shots of what I saw. Enjoy!

Outside a flower shop

On the cobbled path

In Loving Memory of the Unborn Children

2008-07-26T20:15:00.009-04:00

St. Joachim Church | Rockport, MA
July 25, 2008

I went for a brief visit to Rockport, looking for some good shots with my camera and enjoying some quiet time with a good friend. Today is the feast of Sts. Ann and Joachim, aka the parents of Our Blessed Mother. How providential that we came upon a church called: St. Joachim Church, now known as Holy Family Parish. The courtyard had a gravestone with the engraving: "In loving memory of the unborn children." It was a tribute to the children who died via abortion. I thought of the millions of children now documented annually killed in such fashion; in that bitter moment one of my favorite psalms came to mind - something which gives me comfort, reassuring me that God's ways are far greater than any other's. His kingdom will come. When that happens those children will be restored and they will rejoice.

Psalm 139:12-18

Darkness is not dark for you, and night shines as the day. Darkness and light are but one. You formed my inmost being; you knit me in my mother's womb. I praise you, so wonderfully you made me; wonderful are your works! My very self you knew; my bones were not hidden from you, When I was being made in secret, fashioned as in the depths of the earth. Your eyes foresaw my actions; in your book all are written down; my days were shaped, before one came to be. How precious to me are your designs, O God; how vast the sum of them! Were I to count, they would outnumber the sands; to finish, I would need eternity.

Cute cupcakes

2008-07-22T20:21:00.003-04:00

From a local bakery
July 2008

A good friend of mine surprised me with this dessert that she picked up from a local bakery - it was so delightful that I had to get a picture of it. I didn't have a camera with me, but I had a flip camcorder - so here are 3 seconds of it, before it got munched for dessert later. Enjoy!

The grass of the field

2008-07-18T16:50:00.006-04:00

Little bees on sunflower
July 2008

I was out taking some pictures of the garden and a little bee almost flew into my lens as it worked its way around the flowers. I managed to catch these two in my shot as they buried their heads in the nearest sunflower. As I watched my flowers blossom and grow over the summer, with minimal tending on my part, I was reminded of a passage that often brings me comfort in hard times:

Matthew 6:25-31

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat (or drink), or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they? Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span? Why are you anxious about clothes? Learn from the way the wild flowers grow. They do not work or spin. But I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was clothed like one of them. If God so clothes the grass of the field, which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow, will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith? So do not worry and say, 'What are we to eat?' or 'What are we to drink?' or 'What are we to wear?'"

Dessert

2008-07-14T20:56:00.002-04:00

Watermelon style cake
July 2008

Every once in a while one of our community members brings home an odd dessert. After a delicious home-cooked meal, we were presented with this: a sugar coma wrapped in watermelon-colored frosting - tasted nothing like watermelon but it looked interesting enough. The "seeds" were actually chocolate chips embedded in the frosting; both cake and frosting were some white derivative. It was fun, anyway. Enjoy the colors! That's what jumped out at me when I saw it.

Helianthus

2008-07-14T05:54:00.009-04:00

Sunflower, South side Garden
July 2008

Finally the sunflowers we started from seed have begun to bloom! I planted them on the south side because it gets the most sun. It was fun watching them grow because their heads would follow the sun, bending from east to west, and overnight pop back to look east again so they could catch the morning sun.

Eternal rest grant unto them

2008-07-13T20:53:00.004-04:00

Mt. Auburn Cemetery
July 2008

Whenever I get the news that a friend or colleague died suddenly a few hours earlier, those moments are tinged with a surreal suspension. That happened to me to today. Time seemed to freeze a bit longer, as if the news caused a hiccup in the usual flow of seconds. I went later in the day with a friend to Mt. Auburn Cemetery to pray for souls, go birdwatching, and take some pictures. As the sun began to fade, it lit a path through some of the graves that made me think of a favorite prayer:

P. Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord.
R. And let perpetual light shine upon them.
P. May their souls, and the souls of all the faithful departed, rest in peace.
R. Amen.

God bless them.

Ithaca, NY | St. Catherine's

2008-07-11T20:46:00.006-04:00

St. Catherine of Siena Church
July 2008

While on vacation in the Finger Lakes region we went to Mass at St. Catherine's in Ithaca. If you've never read about the life of St. Catherine of Siena I highly recommend it - she was a remarkable saint. The Catholic Encyclopedia has a decent blurb.

Her writings include:

the "Dialogue", or "Treatise on Divine Providence";
a collection of nearly four hundred letters; and
a series of "Prayers".

Anyway it was beautiful here - the trees seemed to peer in through the glass during Mass; light poured in from all sides.

Home skies

2008-07-10T22:06:00.002-04:00

Jamaica Pond
July 2008

After all that travel, I must say it's good to be home. After a scrumptious community dinner with my good friends at Casa: AC, we all went for a walk around the local pond. The sun sank past the trees just as we reached it, and a band of clouds got tickled pink with the last rays. Funny how much more I can appreciate home after I've been away for a little while. There's beauty to be found all around me; it just waits to be discovered and relished. What a beautiful evening; God blessed us.

NY 2008 | Upstate somewhere

2008-07-10T05:55:00.001-04:00

Grapevine Farms

July 2008

Ever been on a road trip where you get off the highway looking for a rest stop and find a real treat on the way? I was on my way to a Dunkin' Donuts, which was 3 miles off the beaten path and saw this on the side of the hill: a beautiful country store. There was a big carved bear outside that said "Welcome to Grapevine Farms" and a storefront with a clean and colorful feel. I had to take a few snaps. After asking the owner for permission to take some pictures, we chatted about her flowers and the store. Her neighborliness reminded me of the delightful southern hospitality I experienced while living in North Carolina for several years: people just enjoy their time more outside the insane pace of city life, I feel. I love my New England city, but I must confess that time isn't as thoughtfully relished there as it was out here. Always good to get a fresh perspective once in a while!

NY 2008 | Finger Lakes region

2008-07-07T06:04:00.004-04:00

Sunset over Lake Cayuga
July 2008

Once in a while my long weekends take me on long drives - this past weekend I actually did manage to get through 6 states in 4 days. New York state was by far the most fun for me this time; I spent about a day there. The finger lakes region is truly quite beautiful - I never knew about them until recently, and I know I'm going back some day to explore some more. Quite the hidden wine country! On my way back to New England I found a quaint little park in Binghamton, NY: it was my first rest stop on that drive home. Lots of light, water, trees and play there - refreshing.

Otsiningo Park | Binghamton
July 2008

Fireworks and family

2008-07-04T21:21:00.002-04:00

Two generations of relatives
July 2008

July 4th weekend has been filled with driving for visits to family & vacation spots. Today I went to visit my cousins at Greenbrier State Park in MD; I hadn't seen some of them in over 4 years! The children I once saw as infants had grown up into beautiful young girls, and it was amazing to see how their parents' features came through in their own faces. More to do tomorrow - we're hoping to head out to the finger lakes in NY.